a good update if you haven’t already seen:

When Gruden broke the fourth seal, I heard the voice of the fourth living creature saying, “Come.” I looked, and behold, an ashen horse; and he who sat on it had the name Peterman; and turnovers were following with him. Authority was given to them over the Oakland Raiders offense, to kill with interceptions and with…

Nathan Peterman likes how copier paper feels on his skin.

Remember that episode of South Park where Cartman gets Kenny to put a picture of his ass as his school picture, and gets it put on a milk carton, and those folks with butts for their faces show up at his door looking for their missing son, and he blows a funny fuse because he’ll never see anything that hilarious ever…

Still only the 2nd most impressive rise from the dead today:

“Daddy, why is this song called ‘Windows 95'?”

I’ve been using “clap’s back” for years.

Here’s Nick Foles basking in the win today

*smacks on gum loudly*

What exactly are the Seahawks?

The Mule is not quite A Perfect World. Like that 1993 film, it finds Eastwood performing (both as actor and director) in two of his most comfortable modes: ambling low-key pulp and quiet regretful elegy.

Drew: I MUST KLANG IT!

Previous “concerned reader” comment checks out.

Drew has a mishap adding a personal addition to the next “What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year” post.

Is he STILL hungover from the Deadspin Awards?!?

What happened?  I am asking as a concerned reader and not because I have Photoshop ideas.

serious: holy shit, Drew, I hope everything’s gonna be ok. We’ll be here waiting for dick and fart jokes as soon as you’re back.

Shit. Get better and don’t let BIG HOSPITAL beat you! We miss you.

We miss you Drew. We all want you to get better. NO ONE DENIES THIS.