So.... maybe I missed it, but where in here do you explain how “the terrible Eastern Conference has a lot to do with the stupid max contract rule”?

+1 Cancelled St Totteringham’s Day #COYS

Current mood:

Hey, look, a derby where the team in all white eviscerated their (normally) red-and-white-clad local rivals!

RM were, as they say, streets ahead of Athleti in this match. Barely a contest. If Benzema had any sort of form it could have been 5 or 6 to nil.

Nonsense, a nation’s third largest and most prestigious club winning the league title is at least on par with one of the greatest sports stories of all time.

Not mentioned: Harry Kane, Dele Alli, Hugo Loris, Mesut Ozil, Alexis Sanchez, Arsene Wenger, Spurs, Arsenal, 2, 0, North London Derby, St. Totteringham’s Day, 4th Place Trophy, “Wenger Out,” “Mind the Gap”

Penultimate article: “I Actually Don’t Like and Have Never Watched Soccer”

You won’t read this on Deadspin (because you don’t care), but it looks like Feyenoord might win the Eredivisie this year. Not quite as important as UEFA (to you).

I’m starting to think, Billy, that you’re writing some fantastic satire when it comes to soccer lately.

On par with Leicester? Are you serious? Do you know anything about League one Billy? How is a club that is the 3rd biggest in its country even close to what Leicester did? Athletico have won la liga before has played in champions league finals. Leicester were in league one less than ten years ago.

Let’s do our reveling regardless. COYS!

Let’s all take a moment to appreciate this wasn’t written by Billy Haisley

Cool. Are we gonna get a recap of Sunday’s NLD or what? I know the Deadspin staff are die-hard Gooners (it autocorrected that to “Goobers”—which is accurate) but... it would be nice to do some revelling TBH.

Apropos of nothing, fuck Arsenal.

You know what’s crazier? Spurs fans aren’t celebrating this monumental achievement of finishing above another club with a fake holiday! Imagine that!

Speaking of things being behind where they normally are, you hear about that time Arsenal finished behind Tottenham on the PL table?

It’s almost like Spurs’ destruction of Arsenal never happened. Weird.

You know what else is insane?

This is not a story about Spurs and scum. 2-0.