Yes, yes, yes, we all bear the yolk of dealing with audible puns.

let’s not count our chickens before they Hatch.

I still think police and politicians should face multipliers on their convictions, because they are in positions of power and we have no choice but to trust them. So if a crime normally carriers a 5 years sentence for a normal, powerless citizen, for a police officer or politician, it should get multiplied by 2.

“Very Legal & Very Cool” is absolutely going to be the title of my second album.

What I like about Trump is that he is tearing down the veil that so many wealthy people have embraced, that being wealthy is somehow equivalent to being smart or praiseworthy. This guy is a complete and utter moron who’s been coasting on generational wealth his whole life. And history will not be kind to him and his…

I want to say thank you for everything you do. I have been lucky in my life to never have needed an elective abortion, but a few years ago I had a missed miscarriage, and my options were to undergo a medical abortion or a D&C when it became clear after 2 weeks that my body wasn’t going to expel the fetus on its own. I…

As obvious as that sounds, it’s a great point

In 2019, you can buy, new:

Nifty!  When you take off the doors and roof, you can put them in the bed and take them with you...

Facebook has just bought Kinja and is in the process of banishing you to the greys.

Unless your dog is a boxer. In which case, good luck ever reclaiming an inch of your bed space or your pillow ever again. 

Your videos are what I imagine my brain thinks about while sleeping.

I LIKE SHORTS BECAUSE THEY ARE COMFY AND EASY TO WEAR!

I realized what that cup design reminded me of.

I’ve had a lavender latte (not from Starbucks) and it was surprisingly good so I might try this. On the other hand, I only have a couple more weeks to drink all the eggnog lattes my poor heart can handle.

“This is not standard practice whatsoever and the matter is being addressed internally with those involved.”

A rogue agency of the federal government fires a internationally agreed-upon chemical weapon across a border at women and children ...

There should be Christmas cards with her face and quotes from her testimony that thousands of people mail to Chuck Grassley to haunt the hell out of him. He needs visits from the ghosts of confirmations past.