Where ever will they find another fat old white dude to write endlessly about the nfl. Ddddddrew?

This may actually dissuade a few of the better free agents from going there, as long as the money is equal. And the Yankees have plenty of money. Give us BRYCE HARPER

eff off

A leader recognizes leadership and follows.

Come to Portland. EVERYONE thinks its cool. Except me; I’m bald :(

As a Portlander, please understand that these shitbags were from Gresham, which is the inbred northeast suburb of Portland. Nobody goes there unless they have exhausted all other options in and around Portland. If anyone is reading this and from Gresham, well congrats on being the 1% that can read out there.

After conferring with my roommate we have decided that if this were a one night stand situation, your behavior would have been okay. After this many dates however, you are the one supplying all the drama.

Self-checkout. Everything gets rung up as rice since it’s up to me to type in the upc code. I spend like $30 a month and eat like a king. If the supermarkets don’t like it, then hire more real people.

Woman beating loser. Maybe he could just punch his car to safety.

Holy Fuck. Can we go one FUCKING day without NFL nonsense? This is like the 500 days of Kristen, but forever. And worse.

Sometimes a bottle is just a bottle. Not this time, but sometimes.

It’s not like Baltimore’s turf is any better. At least Avon Barksdale isn’t around anymore though. That dude was tough.

I’ll bet you ten times out of ten, Nicky, Vinnie, and Tony would beat the shit out of Sully, Knucklefuckle, and Phart.

I actually used to pretend I was super cold after swimming and the cute “older” ladies would towel me off. I did the same thing with skiing and getting hugs. I was a manipulative kid, apparently.

Are you my 7th grade summer camp counselor?

Will someone please buy me a ps4? I’m a good person, I swear.

Millionaires throwing things at other millionaires. But yeah, it’s the fans fault.

I didn’t know Dennis Miller Kinja’d

A partial list of things that suck:

Nein.