God works in mysterious ways.

Ratings! Everywhere A-rod goes there will be attendance hikes and ratings spikes. This is gonna be AWESOME.

I'd like to be the first to report that sometime in the future Alex Rodriguez will be suspended for some time period that could be anywhere from now until the end of time. And maybe 2014. Wake me up when there ANYTHING official.

I was friends with a woman once. Awkward.

Did he also choose the hair that he wishes he could grow?

Did he also choose the hair he wishes he had?

Let's get real about this. He has a white wife, this is why Boston gives him a pass.

Tino hates Whitey.

You expect me not to eat this with my $36,000,000 arm? C'MON!

That was some of the best flying I've seen to date - right up to the part where you got killed.

I just don't get how he gets a free pass on the issue and everyone else who even sniffs a steroid is persecuted. Hopefully his liver and kidneys will fail when he's 43 years old. I pray every night for that to happen.

Can we please talk about David Ortiz? Best year he's ever had and he's almost 40. And his 'roid rage the other night was all the proof I need.

Let me get this straight.. In college, you got high, watched sportscenter, and played intramural sports and got hurt? AND YOU'RE WHITE? Just because mommy says you're special, doesn't mean you are

This show was better when it was Capadocia.

This post should be in Jezebel and this show should be on Showtime. It's awful.

But it is also the day Andy White was born. True Beatles fans know what I mean.

I read your comment before watching the video, and man was I disappointed.

I have been playing NBA video games since Sega and have never once given a the slightest fuck about the dribbling graphics.

4 reading: Anything about the Tour de France

White girl, NO. Asian girl, YES.