People always have the option to not kiss anyone they don’t want to, even in the watchful eye of the kiss cam. They don’t have to settle for “the cheek” if they don’t wanna do anything at all.

Agreed, the kiss cam thing on the surface is harmless but has incredible potential to put people in awkward and invasive situations.

Subway girl/mustard bottle story:

In later news, Half-Life 2 gets its third episode

OH.
That’s an even better version of the story!
Just remember: when you’re telling the story, don’t forget to pause for dramatic effect when you say “I peed EVERYWHERE” right before the line in the song that goes,

I just scrolled through this thread of new replies and I’m picturing you telling the story to the soundtrack of the song Viva La Vida (and I’m not even a coldplay fan).

I used to ruuuule the world...

I wouldn’t go back either. This is pretty much how I imagined how the whole thing happened:

Kid: Goodmorning, Teacher! look, I made a clock, do you like it?

Your teen years in the 80s sounds just like it came out of a raunchy 80s comedy.

Best thing I read all week.

You only had the Blowjob Legend title for a very brief amount of time... have you ever won it back?

I’m wondering that too. It doesn’t look TOO HD, so maybe. I’m hoping!

I was wondering that too. I hate that we have to wonder now if we’re on the side of 3DS owners who can play a 3DS game or not.

I know that there’s only a couple New 3DS games so far that are exclusive to New 3DS but it still irks me

Isn’t Legend of Heroes: Trails of Cold Steel supposed to be on this list?

Jason Schreier’s gon’ be maaaaad

Same, I came to comment that for a split second I thought it was the Duggar dude.

*Sees that Craig Ferguson isn’t in the picture
*Thinks, WTF, why isn’t he included???
*Googles Craig Ferguson
*Sees his run of the show ended, thinks, Wow, man, I’m out of the loop

That’s beside the point, because I remember playing the PS1-era Final Fantasy games back in the day, and the stories were great.

The trouble was that the cut-scenes were unskippable. So imagine you sitting through a long story-filled cutscene, then after it ends you play a few minutes and then die (I dunno, boss…

First date. Dinner date is over.

Girl: I’ll take the check, my treat
Guy: No, no, I’ll get it, of course!
Girl: Let’s split it then :)
Guy: No, it’s okay, I insist

Pause. Okay, so we it’s an equal discussion so far and we think they’re both nice people for offering to pay and that the guy’s a nice guy. But wait...

Girl:…

*I had to pause after reading that first story so I could comment*
When a co-worker or classmate asks me to borrow pen, I will say no unless they use it right there in front of me and give it back right away.

A pen is 10cents when sold in packs. So I’m always completely baffled when I hear stories of people lending a…

... for the right amount of money.
If money’s not enough then they go sportsing elsewhere.
Serious bidniz

On the other hand, what about that child growing up under the constant loving gaze of these loving parents that maybe began her life with phrases like

I know, right? I hear they’re, like, actually getting paid now to play these sportball games things.