Not a golfer, eh?

I'm so disappointed in comments 2 through.... Can someone take their comment cards, please?

Eh. How do you rationalize the squared? (I'm 85% sure I'm setting myself up.)

Dude was obviously sending in his sportscasters' mad lib.

Actually there's at BEST a .14% chance that it's legit. Legitimately.

says the Spanish engineer of the grudge train. Slow down, chief; those curves are a bitch. It's the interwebs. I am actually a neurologist, I teach ONE religion class at a high school as a favor to my dad who is the chair of the department. Regardless of what you may or may not believe, it's an entirely charitable…

You obviously didn't start out as a swimmer...

And oh god no, please don't shoot me. Bullies must be terrified by your gun. I guess I'll just have to settle for exquisitely articulate neologisms. I hope my mastery of the Queen's English is defensive enough against your scary bullets.

Funny you should insinuate that I'm a "bully" or a "troll". I've developed curriculum for middle schools where bullying is widespread. And no, "her" didn't steal my prom date. My hatred for Tim Tebow is that he has been deified by the religious right with no legitimate justification. "You can run on for a long…

Ask Kurt Hester about Tim Tebow. Ask anyone at D1 Training in Franklin, TN about Tim Tebow. Ask them about his self-serving inability to show up to "train" without his entourage. Who the fuck goes to a private sports performance facility with an entourage? Dudes that need continuous affirmation and a sense of…

Did Mikhail Prokhorov buy the team, move them to New Jersey, and change their name to the "Myets"? That's the only possible explanation for Jersey juicehead, here.

The digression of this thread is liable to reach libelous proportions.

Aren't you a solid century and a half late in being a "true abolitionist fan"? And what?? I'm hoping you're serious and that your real name has Frederick Douglass in it.

Just an aside: that's not a back-shoulder fade at all. Johnson is just running a hitch and whoever the QB is (Frat Stafford, I'm assuming), throws Johnson out of his break and away from Houston. Good catch, nonetheless. Impressive, hardly.

Put the ball on the 45 on the left hash going in... Wait, we can't because there's a spotlight trailer in the middle of the field...

Score one for the home cream.

Irony upon irony: Fred Hickman is the sports director of a Fox affiliate down here in NOLA. He still puts everyone to sleep and can still never be understated.

It's obvious by the misspelling of a name that's an inch away in any direction and the outrageous Tebow-y handle that you're keen on sarcasm.

I'm just fucking with you, Bro Weider. I know why you did it, but this is Deadspin, and the regular commenters don't let stuff like that fly. I'm surprised it took so long for someone with any credentials to actually offer any advice.

If you have "itis" in your elbows, it's best to activate the muscles on either side of the elbow joint (i.e. biceps/triceps on the proximal end, and finger flexors/extensors on the distal or hand end). A lot of types of elbow tendon inflammation (usually lateral or medial epicondylitis) are caused by overuse of that…