I have pamphlets on electro-convulsive therapy that I can mail you.

It does cause cancer, except when it doesn’t... But only if it does.

As long as you adjust for confounders, you’re golden.

That kind of takes “antiquing” to a whole new level, doesn’t it?

Man, we in public health do a very shitty job of communicating risk. This whole “yeah, maybe, kinda, sorta, but not really, but yeah, but no” attitude is beyond annoying. At the health department, I wanted to write in the flu report that the flu vaccine prevents influenza, but nooooo! I had to write that it “may”…

I was born and raised in Mexico. When I mention that, speaking in English, I get the “You speak English good, you. Apply for citizenship. Go to school. Don’t be a gardener.”

1. Most illegal/undocumented aliens are here because they overstayed their visa, or didn’t need a visa to visit/travel here to begin with. (Surprise, America, a lot of them are not brown people from Latin America!)

Some dogs do it better than others.

How does that even work? You can be half, one fourth, one eighth, one sixteenth, then one thirtysecond... But one 28th?

Keep ‘em coming!

Willow bark has salicylic acid, which is a precursor and works kind of like aspiring. That probably helps with the flu symptoms. One joke I always make is that I once had the flu for a week, then took homeopathy and it cured it in about five days. So take that, Big Pharma!

Fool. If Thousand Island worked for anything, we wouldn’t have plague in Madagascar.

The citizen-experimenter approach is a step backwards. We had that approach before Institutional Review Boards and ethics panels. People who see big pharmaceuticals as the enemy and want to be part of the resistance (and get a few bucks in the process, maybe) will fall prey to small, unregulated companies with nothing…

Too many people still buy into that. It’s that denialism (or self-denial, as in “I’m too healthy to be sick”) that has led to some outbreaks of it lately.

What dressing did you use?

I was hoping to click on this and read, “Said no one, ever!”

Adventure. Excitement. Kinja stars. An Epi seeks not these things.

I would... Except that he’s... OH! I see what you did there!

“He decided to try and control his infection via natural means, like healthy eating.”

“I’m now married and very monogamous.”