He was not wearing his seatbelt, nor pants, police said

...should have sprung for the fully-loaded mod...

or could be that the sloth started the weekend on slursday (s/he is smiling)...

So, which one is Gallant and which one is Goofus?

MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! #FightMe

yeah, a right to the twins...

Might go nicely w/these, though I’m guessing flip-flops instead of boots

Can you wear a tux without pants?

...one of those big doorstop hams packed in two pints of ham water (OMG HAM WATER EVERYWHERE)...

Survey says...

Oh, and someone got shot that night, just down the block.

nobody wants to make a decision about what they want to eat, but I know that whatever I choose, people will shit on me for ordering something they don’t like

The closest you can get is buying the laserdisc versions for $150 on eBay

Are you sure it wasn‘t dates wrapped in bacon?

First, buy a big fucking rib roast with the bone still in it. Second, buy a really big onion

Always show your work as you may get partial credit

is that before or after you gash your finger? also, unless you wear “the shirt”, I’m going with Burneko

Put me down for the under!

Too late for the Two Henrys 3rd Annual Biertoberfest (shamefully admits to being the #10 guy) but pleasantly surprised: terrific beers from places I’ve never heard of (the host brewery included). Great brother bonding experience (he’s a wine drinker - meh), the live band was fantastic, friendly people - casual and not…