Several of my friends don't get Conan, and don't understand why I like him. This is why—letting an actor do a dumb, decade-long gag on his shows. No other host would have approved of such shenanigans, shutting it down after the first time to appease the sponsors. Conan don't care. Conan revels in committed, comedic,…

It's never gonna happen, but I still dream of a day when Arrow Ollie morphs from west coast Batman into the righteous, politically conscious firebrand that actually sets the character apart.

Man, Spider-Man is a mess lately, huh? A conceptional hot potato. No one seems to know what the fuck to do with him anymore.
At this point let's just go with the sure thing and make him a Muppet. Everyone loves Muppets.

…leading to the Bones cast being sent to purgatory, finally freeing up untold hours of weekly airtime from NCIS: Holograms and Bad Jokes? Yes?

Hopefully this leads to the crossover event, "It's…Mama!"

Well, there's probably no gee whiz-ier actor out there.

My theory is that the Carpet is the Genie's previous master from when he was a crueler, more literal wish-granter. Some kid found the lamp, wished he could fly and POOF!
After all, Carpet and Genie clearly know each other, and Al is "a lot taller" than Genie's last master…

Damn straight! That'll learn 'em but good! *pats own back.
Always happy to do hypothetical good in this world.

I suspect there have been a lot of comments to this story along the lines of, 'I'd eat anything Ariana licked, hurr hurr! I'll give you something else to lick, bitch!'
Then, within 12 seconds, they change tabs and post on another thread, 'Why don't women like nice guys like me? Shallow, sexist whores!'

And with this silly nonstory…Have a good weekend, AVC! See ya Monday!

…There's a Teen Wolf series that's been going on for FIVE seasons?

Eh, sounds fine to me. He's a fine actor and filmmaker, and being a darling of sensational tabloids 15 years ago doesn't change that.
On the other hand. ..did you know that Robert Downey Jr. is playing a superhero these days?! Is he paid in bail bonds or WHAT?

Poor Storm. She never seems to get a fare shake. She's usually known as the thinnest character in original movies by the general public, or reviled for her punk phase by casual comic fans. She probably deserves a decent movie to set the records straight.
Maybe around 2026, once Marvel/Sony has already done their…

For humbleness sake, one of my favorite King of the Hill moments was Hank learning he wasn't born in Texas and questioning his very identity…"Oh god, Peggy, I could be a Chris!"

It's just…I'll never be a James!
(And it's Chrississesis)

Where has Chris Tucker been for the last 15 years? As a Chris myself, I feel underrepresented in culture as is. We're riding high with Pratt right now, but who else do we have? Rock and Nolan are pretty good, as is Guest…Walken is a little dubious, being more meme than man, and no one likes Columbus anymore (both…

*Shrugs. Like I said, not a perfect analogy. There's probably an icky incest indy drama that serves as a good parrelel example, but I don't particularly want to seek it out anymore than I would whatever direct-to-video Hostel movies that are probably floating around.

Imagine that, conservatives losing their shit over Obama executive actions when the most conservative "front runner" of them all brags about all the executive orders he plans to use right away.
Not that I'm a gloating hyper-lefty smirking at extreme Repluplican hyprocy.
Oh wait. I am.

*clears throat, puts on red tie with flag pin, fluffs hair…
You have no idea what makes this country great! It's not racism, it's realism! I'm the only one who gets it! Who gets that brown people are coming into OUR America, and that's not okay! Stop being so PC, pussies! Border wall! Tough On Browns! Arglebargle, PC…

Yeah, but he's also rich and white…therefore okay by Trump. "Europeans are sending their wealthy, their pure, their inherently moral…and maybe some, I assume, are cannibal psychopaths."
At least Hannibal's wealth grew the economy before he was arrested! We should laud him as a hero job-creator, not a villain for his…