The Fast and Furious franchise needs a fresh new perspective. Who better to usher in a dark and incomprehensibly weird direction than Twin Peak’s David Lynch?

I love this. It’s got the two-polo-shirts-both-with-popped-collars look.  Just goes to show you can never have too much of a good thing.

DeLorean. They only built one car and it could time travel. I’d call that a pretty big accomplishment.

My brown 2015 Toyota Camry LE: Boring by Billie Eilish

I will admit it actually doesn’t look half-bad with the shrunken down grille.

Because Steer by Wire worked so well for Infinity (rolls eyes).

The stratospheric ascent of Tesla from the lowly beginnings of making the (terrible) Roadster from the bones of a Lotus Elise to the automotive leader it is today (FSD, media circus, etc. warts and all).

Buttons!  (the real kind, not superimposed on a touchscreen)

My buddy’s Jeep Wrangler. The transmission was vague, with long throws, and just plain didn’t feel good to shift. In all fairness, I was coming from my Honda S2000, but still. The 1990 Audi 80 that I learned to drive a manual on was more engaging, and that’s not saying much.

This is the guy that harassed a female and posted it to social media, right?

Apparently, according to the 111 people that bought one this year, the 2020 Dodge Journey.

Don’t forget the Maverick Raptor EV

The 2021-2023 used car market is going to be a hot mess hodge-podge of features.  Are they tracking which features were excluded by VIN?  I’m trying to think ahead when buying a car from these years how to know what is included and what isn’t, since model and trim won’t necessarily tell the whole story.

I hope the name Grecale Folgore sounds better out loud than it does in my head. When I look at that it, I’m imagining some small, dirty, cave-dwelling creature from Lord of the Rings.

Let’s also make sure that we remove the bare minimum exercise most people get: walking.

...to get lost in the parking lot

This literally couldn’t be more generic looking. Ford Escape up front, Mazda CX-30 in the rear...but somehow less attractive than either.

Scion iQ/Aston Martin Cygnet. Nothing screams “hot hatch” like a CVT and 0-60 in 11.6 seconds.

Trim coming loose on the steering wheel with less than 4k miles? Not exactly confidence-inspiring in a ~$60k+ vehicle.

Ford pulled one of these back in ‘85 with one of their Mustang commercials. It’s all there: “cool kids” dancing, terrible music, and scenes that have literally nothing to do with what the ad is promoting.  I don’t know if it was more cringe then or now.  Probably both.