To be fair, pony should be on all playlists for any occasion.

be careful with these accusations, Ashley... tread

Meh. I’m still for it. I think it’s overall still helping to normalize bf, even though glamourized breastfeeding is still hilarious to me.

Oh I was, um, 29?

I’m really glad to hear that about John Goodman.

I am trying not to be super salty about this because any improvement would be good but for fuck’s sake. It is REALLY HARD for me to be rooting for better paternity policies for men (especially in other countries) when the maternity policies here in the US are still a goddamn crapshoot. I know it’s not the point of the…

It’s totally intellectually dishonest.

Exactly! Your wife is willing to have sex with you in the living room, she asks you to put down your beer before you spill it, you get off her and start complaining while still holding the beer, and *she* is the joyless harpy in this situation?

no nut is worth staining a $5000 couch.

Omg I have always watched that scene where she “kills the mood out of fear that he’ll spill beer on her Italian silk couch” and thought that would be me. He really would have spilled the beer. I just couldn’t let that happen. I’ve thought about that scene a lot and have tried to work against my calling as a neurotic…

I can attest to Amber’s story about Hasidic Jews in Williamsburg - they don’t give a fuckkkkk about rules of the road. They double park EVERYWHERE and act like there are literally no such thing as traffic laws.

The only thing he’s not doing well is talking about his daughter to the media.

Well, that might make you some kind of snack proctologist.

I read an interview several years ago in which Chris Harrison admitted that they have trouble finding older women who can pass both the psych and std tests. However, I think it would be worth the extra effort. Forget girls with barely ticking biological clocks; let’s have some real women whose dating pool is even…

I hadn’t realized MTV had canceled it. I just assumed that the whole shitshow had moved into the White House.

I’m not poor at all and I’m not spending $300 on a gym bag (or any bag). That’s how I stay not poor.

YES. THIS IS MY FAVORITE POST OF THE YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aww, I actually think it’s cool that’s she’s the only woman in LA who HASN’T gotten lip fillers.

Holy fucking COCK! What’s up with these crazy dickaroos. It’s like they have to mention they suck God’s dick after every sentence.

I’m so glad, I literally spent an hour searching for a photo that would have this effect.