All these replies are excellent but this one is perfect.

“For some reason, the issue of the Ring has emerged as a paramount issue for the Fellowship.” -Pence the White, Year 3019 of the Third Age

‘op meq wanI’vammo’ tlha’ tlhIngan veSDuj qaStaHvIS yer ‘orghengan moj potlh wanI’vammo’ tlha’ DIvI’ - Klingon Captain Pence

You guys are tweeting all these at him, right?

“For some reason, the issue of nazis has become a paramount issue for the Jews” - Mike Pence at a Nuremberg nazi rally 1936

“For some reason, this issue of meteors has become an issue for the dinosaurs,” said Penceasaurus Rex.

“Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.” -President Pence, 30 seconds later.

‘For some reason, this issue of slavery has become a paramount issue for the black people in this country.” -General Grant Pence, circa 1860

Could not agree more! Perfection.

“Nam aliquam causam, et facti sunt exitus Wisigotharum est eamque intimam secum fert ut civium exitus.” Imperator Pence, 410 

omg i cant breathe

“Why doth the peasantry fret so o’er this ‘Black Death’? ” ~Lord Pence, c. 1350 

“For some reason, this issue of smallpox has become a paramount issue for the Natives.” Colonist Pence, 1616

“For some reason, this issue of icebergs has become a paramount issue for the passengers.” Captain Pence, 1912

From the bottom of my cold black heart, thank you for posting that. It was DELIGHTFUL.

I remember suggesting that they do a coffee table book way back before Trump was elected. I don’t remember them saying that they would do it though.

Cruz. But yes, and thanks for dropping the link for everyone else.

Did you see Samantha Bee and Al Franken mentioning each other’s descriptions of Trump yesterday? You’ll definitely enjoy it.

While everyone is Googling Jeff Koons, I’d like to express my ongoing glee at the neverending new descriptions of Trump. I want to believe there’s a big whiteboard where The Slot writers keep track of which scrotum comparisons have been used and brainstorm new ones.