Actually, you should feel bad for Lady Gaga the cat. She over grooms because her previous owner was killed by her boyfriend over the summer. Then Lady Gaga had to go to a foster home where the other cats bullied her. Then she had to move to another state to live with me. Immediately after the move she was fixed. She…

I have a cat named Lady Gaga. She has to wear pajamas because of her over grooming. You can feel bad for her. And also think she is adorable.

That was way harsh, Tai.

FULL METAL KINJA

You know racism’s gotten bad when male cheerleaders think they have the right to make fun of anyone else.

“uncucked”

I had the carnitas but I *still* subscribe to this theory!

Your dream tells me that you feel like the extra calories in the Chorizo are a good reason not to order it, but even though you try to burn those extra calories you still feel like it is going to come back to you but this is your body and you can’t just STOP ordering Chorizo.

This seems...not new?

I DON’T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS!

That is a weird dream.

It means you REALLY want 2016 to be over...

“He’s one of these hot guys who’s mildly funny but actually thinks he’s comedian level funny,” she writes. “You know the type — there’s probably one in your office or family. He just reeks of that. It’s an entitled air. When Hammy wants to be funny, he’s, well, not.”

THIS IS WEIRD.

Where did Israel and Palestine get peace?

It’s perfect! He sends Jared off to the Middle East “and don’t come back until there’s peace!” Donald will finally have Ivanka all to himself. Maybe she’ll move into the White House, what with Melania staying in NYC...

We have a psychopath for president-elect who is attempting (as a good psychologist friend of mine put it) to gaslight the whole country.

Words. Mean. Nothing. Anymore.

Hey hey, whoa now. Calling neo-nazis “Fecal-Americans” is a disservice to fecal matter. Manure is actually beneficial to the world.

Pretty scary stuff. Unions are an option, certainly, and I would never discourage anyone from joining a union.