You watch baseball and absorb the litany of mushbrain former players in major broadcasting roles and I’m sitting here thinking, “how big of an asshole and an idiot would a former player have to be to end up doing podcasts for Barstool and inventing stories to get people’s attention?”

I’ve kinda thought for a long time that he borders on being Forrest Gump level stupid and that stuff like this creeps out because he believes most of Belichick’s “I’m obviously just saying this right now to motivate you later” schtick.

I’ll stope pretending when you stope pretending. Why did we start pretending?

“Because rap is the devil’s music.”

lmao

Totally fair! To be clear, your larger point in the OP, that the list is ridiculous, is 1,000% true. I just found singling him out to be an interesting jumping off point for a conversation—just as a contrast, he often gets placed high-ish on “greatest guitarist” lists and gets similar conversations going. He wasn’t…

Absolutely not true. He was an incredible singer. It wasn’t multiple octaves or runs and trills, but with him, it was an incredible tone along with an almost bizarre ability to convey emotion through his singing. Better than Whitney? Technically? Of course not. Artistically? It’s a fun conversation.

“Could you imagine if the roles were reversed, and my name was Eric Trump, and I breathed through my mouth and had slicked-back blonde hair that all came together to make me look like an aged villain from an 80s high school movie?!”

Dude, it is worth googling around on this one though. Guy might be the dumbest motherfucker on the planet.

lmao

We, as a species, are currently going batshit insane racing one another to fix problems that don’t exist.

Since Splinter has shut down I just wanted to stop by and thank the single dumbest human being that has ever tried to operate the internet. So, thank you. You. Yes, you.

Sliding into 2B, getting clearly tagged, and acting like you made it is one thing. Walking toward first after a probably strike on a three-ball count, same thing.

Part of me wants her to start combing their timelines for the inevitable wealth of stupidity and ignorance and start quizzing them on what tf they meant *here*.

Someone says “gee sorry, I didn’t realize, you guys are right,” and thousands of twitterers parse every word of that and try to poke holes in it and turn *that* into the shamable offense.

Yeah, and then you get him through an inning, ok, no harm no foul. You have him sit down and get back up, and then leave him in to load the bases AND give up a grand slam?

So, let’s say he somehow got the nomination. Ramps up campaigning one-on-one against DJT and by March 2020, without having chosen a running mate, he drops dead.

Holy crap this is a bad take.

Hey thanks Roxxie!

“You’re black, so you can’t like Trump!” West said, mimicking his critics.