Anne, please. It’s Za44y.

We traveled to see her in D.C. (because we figured it would be a literal madhouse if we tried to get in closer to where we resyyyyyde) and Valerie Jarrett was hosting and it was amazing but when POTUS44 brought his wife perfect roses at the end of her talk I literally stood up and SCREAMED.

Obama was always one of the fitter Presidents. Nows he regaining some of the elixir he lost. I still miss him.

He didn’t work out - he *got* out. And I couldn’t be happier for him.

North Korea, now that's a place with a great southern border!

My heart says we are all that light boy in the background constantly screaming BARACK OBAMA!!!*

It’s amazing how much free time a man can have once he’s no longer spending every waking moment trying to save the country from itself.

Damn, I got excited there for a moment thinking this article was going to be about how Barack Obama got thicc. *sigh* Alas, it was not to be.

Sometimes it makes me sad though– Obama being gone. I have to remind myself that some birds aren’t meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away, the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up does rejoice. But still, the place you live in is that much more gray and empty that…

This is like a kidnap victim reading their captor’s manifesto while being videotaped. Surprised that these assholes aren’t holding a copy of today’s newspaper as proof of life.

Managers who say they have an “open door policy”, are managers no one wants to talk to.

Kim Jong Un just called out his entire staff and had them shot with anti-aircraft guns for their comparative lack of sycophancy.

TELL THEM HOW FUCKING CALM I WAS!! TELL THEM!!

Wait a minute, farmers get another fucking bail out and I am over here paying taxes like a chump? Where does this 16 billion fucking come frome?

Holy shit. This stuff gets more ridiculous by the minute. Trump has now become a parody of Alec Baldwin parodying him on Saturday Night Live.

It’s gone full Ottoman Empire, folks.

It’s a good life, Donnie. You’re a good boy, Donnie. Of course you were big and strong. Real good boy, Donnie.

What type of a fucknut cowboy doesn’t take his hat off inside? 

They both have atrocious hair, so there’s that. Marriages have been built on shakier foundations.