If there’s one thing my dating life is always good for is a good laugh!

There was also a point during the date where I felt the need to ask if he was a serial killer. His answer was no, obviously, and I believed him. Because I also believed he was truly dumb, lacking even the most basic levels of common sense.

I went on a date once with a guy in law school. I asked what made him want to study law and he said “Law and Order is my favorite show!”

Can you imagine how difficult it must be to live like that? There’s always something evil lurking around the corner that some mythical deity is using to punish the world for committing other kinds of evil.

You’re correct, he was temporarily suspended after being removed from school in handcuffs. My apologizes.

You’re right. My apologizes, I can see how my attempt at vagueness could be misunderstood. He was arrested, questioned without his parents’ or an attorney present, charged with a hoax bomb (those charges were later dropped) and then suspended for a few days, even after it was determined his clock was not a bomb, and…

That’s so good to hear. When did you speak with him? I always figured that being thrown out of school because the people you trusted to give you an education thought you might be a terrorist would be incredibly heartbreaking.

I probably could’ve run a meth lab while living at home in high school and my parents would’ve been oblivious.

I see you’re familiar with the American Proverb “What I do not want, you cannot have.”

I can be a bit shy, and I already felt my dignity had taken a hit. The bathroom was about 10 feet away from the bed and frankly I didn’t feel like taking a shit just a few feet away.

I had a very very embarrassing one night stand with my ex’s best friend and had to poop so, so bad. But his bathroom was in his bedroom and so I left. Except I was out of town staying at a friend’s house and she wasn’t answering. So I did my business at a gas station and after waiting I thought I could probably just…

My mother once told me she wasn’t sure if she liked me as a person. She said she loved me, because she had to, but she didn’t like me. Not related to my appearance, but yeah that was a fun day.

He’d manage to spin it so that the guy he shoved in the way “jumped” in to save his life and everyone who already supports him will be like “yeah! Hero!” Or even worse trump will claim he tried to push him out of the way and it was just an unfortunate miscommunication with himself.

Exactly. Trump is a billionaire nutcase and frankly his opinions don't bother me. But when his opinions are suddenly supported by a frightening number of Americans, that's what worries me.

Exactly.

We are incapable of learning unless a man is available to provide us with his acquired information. It’s evolution. The man goes out to survey the environment and discover the musicians and the woman stays at home to raise the children and listen to the MP3s the man has discovered. It’s science. Thousands of years of…

The last guy I dated was so cute. He was constantly like “Have you ever heard of [insert musician from a decade ago] I just discovered them and they are great!”

I for one cannot see how this would back fire in any way. Seems like a very solid “never been tried before” plan.

I don’t say this often about celebrities but I feel like I would like her as a person.

Red head, sure, but don’t hold your breath on the curly hair.