That's just...bullshit. Cheer your team, razz the opposition, but throwing stuff and hitting a player because he scored against your boys' sorry defense isn't cool.

Brain fart? Absolutely. Inconceivable own goal that defies explanation? No. It may also be extremely possible that the defender simply rushed the clear out and didn't get the height that he wanted. In his defense, what were the odds that the goalie would happen to walk right into a line drive kick.

No Capricorn(y) One?

It used to piss me off during college, when all I would here during any NY game was my roommate screaming "FUCK" at the top of his lungs. There is just no need for it, that is unless you have money on the line.

I like the ritual of tequila shots, and if you stick to one they're a nice way to kick off a celebration. But I will not do shots all night with you. I will do one tequila shot when we get to the bar, and then sip gimlets all night like someone who has to be mildly functional tomorrow.

I grew up in Boston and am a Boston fan, my favorite team has always been the Bruins. Since 2001 the run Boston teams have been on is obviously unreal. If I could hot tub time machine it back to 2000 and tell a Bostonian that over the next 12 years all 4 teams would win a total of 8 Championships and then drop the…

Your spite is my entertainment. Just another sucker who watches Boston win title after title, and just can't stand it. Imagine our elation, in contrast to your seething anger....8 TITLES since 2001 and counting, LOL.

The dinner roll is extremely underrated. Enjoyed as a mini-sandwich with a bunch of FEEEEXINS inside, or to clean up the goop left over on an empty plate, or simply by itself with a glob of butter, the dinner roll continues to be an under-appreciated addition to the traditional Thanksgiving Meal. It deserves a Top 10…

I have a staffer named Ray Lewis. He is a mid-twenties average looking white guy / hipster. Without fail every single time I introduce him someone asks him if he is retired, how it feels to be an accomplice to murder or to see his Superbowl Ring. People are dumb.

This is more enlightening on the mind of media types than it is on Bill (or any other coach for that matter.) Sports press is awful "journalism" and yet it gets away with bullying coaches by asking dumb shit questions then lambasting any coach who dares get incredulous in news outlets to the point people write off an…

The Patriots were carried, as they have quietly and increasingly been in recent years, by their defense.

Yeah like Denver has anybody better than the Jets/Bills/Dolphins in its division. They made the playoffs with Tebow under center.
Case closed!

If he just murders Manziel instead he'll have an entire nation of sportswriters to defend him.

No joke. A few personal items left behind and a few wine glasses missing? Not worthy of an email. But broke the glass shelf in the shower? Broke the lock off the bathroom door? Put holes in the walls? The fuck?

GOODBYE ORGASM. IT'S BEEN FUN. Now I can finally get things done!

I used to work at a state beach as a lifeguard. Because we were understaffed, most of the restroom janitorial tasks were ours. Between mandated 30 minute periods of explaining to kids why they shouldn't throw rocks at each other and then explaining to their parents why their kids shouldn't throw rocks at each other,…

Kanye West, right in the middle of accepting some award. World Hero status would be handed out the next day.

I would love the self driving car in the event that I leave NYC and ever want to go to a bar, but there would still be problems. Thousands of people everymonth would get shit faced and say "FUCK IT BRO. WE'RE DRIVIN TO L FUCKIN A. WHOOO." Then they wake up at a gas station an hour into Ohio, while their car waits for…