Her radiant beauty illuminates au naturel.

> cork taint

Having ancestry you didn’t know about? It’s not unusual.

Let’s get Philippa Langley on the case.

Alas, poor Shakespeare. I knew him, Jezebel: a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy.

This isn’t a restaurant story, but Holly Samuels’ story immediately brought this to mind:

About 9 years ago I worked for a city-run event space in California. Because we were right off the main drag, a lot of people came in looking for just general information about the area. We were told that we needed to help…

“They are also believed to have the ability to rob men of their hpoun – a concept that could roughly be translated as “masculine power”.”

It isn’t any sillier than saying, “God doesn’t want you to have premarital sex,” or “This cracker will transform into the flesh of a 1st century carpenter when you eat it.”

Ha! That's just what I was thinking about. Women are so vile and yet somehow babies keep being made...

Religion. Fucking dumb.

Sooooo......a pair of underwear that is in close proximity to <that what shall not be named> remains forever unclean. Does this mean that the penises that presumably enter said taboo spot also remain forever unclean?

My father loved telling this story: Just after WWII, he was working in the Polo Grounds (NYC) at a baseball game as guard or whatever. A patron removed his shirt.

“All taxation is theft! It’s MY property!”

Whatever his motive, he may have saved someone's life - including the customers'. As for overserving, let's assume the customers sat there for four hours of trivia, drinking watery, cut-rate margaritas. That means they got 1.5 drinks per hour worth of alcohol if they even got a full serving in those icy sugar bombs,…

Grill it until it’s tender enough to shove into my monogrammed thermos.

We go to Ruby Tuesday’s fairly often as an after movie dinner place, and the idea of a guy acting like a wine expert there is hysterical, it’s like pretending to be a connoisseur of steak at Arby’s.

The Platinum Card story may be the only time that having a customer’s card declined was not a f*cking nightmare as a server. Bravo on that one working out for once.

This BCO.... this BCO has EVERYTHING (to make you believe in Justice!)....

Surely he’d recall his identity after just one look at his monogrammed thermos.

I love the idea that he wasn’t supposed to call the police on people about to endanger those around them.