My fave parts of that article are the writer calling Fabio a “human vibrator” and “the #1 reason for why many used romance novels are covered in dried coochie cream.”

“Brandi Glanville of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is dating Theo Von from Road Rules: Maximum Velocity Tour.”

I’m amazed at how different this Kylie looks compared to the Kylie of two years ago. She didn’t have those hips or ass, and it’s a completely different face. The only thing I recognize is her chin.

it’s like a 45% win... you can tell she means well, she just didn’t quite get there mentally, verbally, or in any other capacity

This is not a win. ‘I have bigger friends’ is the ‘I have black friends’ of fat shaming. Ashley Graham is beautiful, and represents a moderadly more realistic image of women. Her body, her business.

“some of my best friends are size 16"

In related news, ‘80s Kevin Kline and ‘80s Mia Farrow have adopted a dog.

It sounds like he’s one of the Palin kids. Country names are just like, take one or two syllables at random and put them together. Cashton. Jaceley. Mylar. Tren. Bonus points if it has a stupid spelling. But it’s interesting to know it’s an actual name- I’ve never heard it except for him!

Whiskey hates me but I fucking love whiskey.

I think they do, but everyone around them says, “OF COURSE IT WOULD, IT IS BRILLIANT!” and that’s how 30 Odd Foot Of Grunts has multiple albums.

Celebrities never seem to ask themselves “would this be released if I wasn’t famous?".

It reads like it was written by Marnie

A vagina attached to a human over thirty should do the trick.

I made my favorite t-shirt because of this doc.

We used to have a wall in front of my high school called...The Wall. If you hung out there you were “trouble” and most definitely skipped class, had a Mötley Crüe inspired haircut (although you listened to pre-”Ride the Lightning” Metallica, not fucking Mötley Crüe) and wore torn jeans, matching jacket with a big ass…

Its a great companion piece to “Decline of Western Civilisation Part II: The Metal Years”

There should be a countdown whenever people start loving a female celebrity and putting her on a pedestal to the inevitable day they call her out for something maybe even beyond her control and tear her down. I'm so sick of this same cycle again and again.

Does the name “Puth” bother anyone else? It’s like the moist of last names.

I lived in Moline (well, Geneseo) for 3 years. While my time there wasn’t the best, I did attend a lot of good shows (at VFWs and abandoned warehouses) and saw some great acts.