Hmm... how to make America safe... I know! Let’s cut funding to the programs that ACTUALLY help keep us safe so we can funnel that money toward a giant, expensive, useless project that won’t do a damn thing to prevent unauthorized immigration. What could possibly go wrong!?

She’s so stunning. If I looked like that I wouldn’t bother with makeup either.

Amen, Bravo, etc.

Ooh! That’s a good one!

My childhood BFF was nearly a million in when all was said and done when she got mown down in a crosswalk during our sophomore year of college by an uninsured undocumented immigrant with no driver’s license. He fled the scene and was only tracked down later because someone who witnessed the accident wrote down a plate…

Yeah! That’s him! He’s a certified wackjob, isn’t he?

Oh! Well, that’s OK then... I mean, obviously people need some sort of incentive to not stay poor.

That’s my plan. I have to work, and I also have to go to school, but I also plan to wear red, be awesome, and go a little out of my way to get my customary late-afternoon coffee from the shop that’s owned by a Syrian guy whose coffee is mediocre but who always greets me by name like I’m a long-lost friend and tells me…

I’d like to find out too. According to the NRA guy (Wayne... something?), it’s $1500 a week. I need the cash so I can go buy some guns and fulfill my destiny as one of those left-wing violent extremists Wayne has been warning everyone about.

That guy... that fuckin guy...

That’s the whole plan! When I’m done patching up the accident victims in the ER I can give them my card and offer to be their personal injury attorney. One-stop shopping!

By that logic, we should scrap the entire military.

My wife and I fall into the category of upper-middle class incomes that will see the most benefit from this plan. We are both nurses (and I am a soon-to-be lawyer), and we are both utterly disgusted by the notion that this plan is somehow an improvement on the ACA. My wife’s patients in particular (mostly people who…

“I don’t recall” is the classic tell of liars everywhere. When it later turns out that what he didn’t recall actually happened, he can just say, “well all I said was that I didn’t recall; not that it didn’t happen.”

Is your state a model rule state? That (unfortunately) sounds pretty consistent with my understanding of the ethics rules.

I’m skeptical as well, Chef (ha!) but if this story is true, then the implications are absolutely terrifying to me, and should be extremely concerning for every American.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Being regularly waterboarded.

I’d be satisfied to see them all wearing orange jumpsuits for the rest of their natural lives.

It should be noted that Mr. Khan is a U.S. citizen (and has been for 30 years). To me, this is the most horrifying aspect of this story.