My microwave has extensive video documentation of my love of Kraft macaroni and cheese and Hot Pockets, and has sent me a message threatening to turn over the information to my employer who will now require me to undergo genetic testing for the propensity towards obesity. Based on the results, my health insurance…

And there was me thinking the biggest challenge they had was the Russians appearing to have so damn much blackmail material that Putin keeps doing whatever he wants and Trump appears to keep diving to roll over and show his genitals in submission (which makes a nice change to his allegedly doing it to non-consenting…

Maybe we should consider that America is the bad guy and Russia should win! Just a random suggestion, I dunno!

But Trump isn’t curing Cancer. 

If somebody crushed my ‘66 Charger, after I spent 2-1/2 years bringing it back from the dead, I’d unapologetically lose my shit.

Oh no. Please don’t go. We’ll miss your well thought out insight and mature commentary.

I suggest you follow Trump on Twitter if you want to see the English language abused.

No, fuck all that. An Indian immigrant was MURDERED in Kansas just a few days ago by a white supremacist who was motivated by the type of anti-immigrant sentiment that Donald Trump has promoted and mainstreamed further than any other politician in recent memory. And what does he do? Basically completely dismisses the…

I did not miss the part where he mentioned something vague about the environment on the same day he rescinded a clean water initiative of Obama’s. He’s an ignorant and vulgar twat.

Did you miss the part where he shifted the blame of the botched Navy SEAL operation to the generals and Obama? This man is a fucking disgrace and a coward. No one should respect this man. What a piece of shit.

Nothing says “self confident” like a man who judges himself based on the jeans other people wear. And his own leg size.

Nothing says “self confident” like a man who judges himself based on the jeans other people wear. And his own leg…

What a bold suggestion

What a bold suggestion

Levi’s 569s: Because when you need to overcompensate, don’t compromise.

Levi’s 569s: Because when you need to overcompensate, don’t compromise.

Do you wear boots everyday as well, or are you ankles so freaking swole you need the room too?

Do you wear boots everyday as well, or are you ankles so freaking swole you need the room too?

I bet you call your kid a “pussy,” don’t you?

I bet you call your kid a “pussy,” don’t you?

“Pewdiepie pointed out that in snippet of footage, he was asking his fans to stop using Swastikas,”

I enjoy cunts. I have spent many happy hours in their soft folds. I do not feel the same about Donald’s soft folds.

Excuse me sir, the cunt community doesn’t wish to be associated with the Trump Shit Show.

This guy is such a cunt.

to quote many and internet commenter, is this really the hill you want to die on? Defending a fuck face who pushed an old lady out of his way?