It is not often that I am rendered speechless.

Topical but overused

Octopuses!

At least Nixon had government experience though. And unfortunately had enough knowledge to allegedly sabotage piece talks without getting caught at the time (meaning he or people working for him knew who to pressure/ offer things to).

Wallace & Gromit was my fuckin jam back in 5th grade. Basically how I discovered claymation.

I love this bodega, and yay for Seamless too, and I need to know if the bodega has a cat so I can submit it to https://twitter.com/Bodegacats_. Latest:

Milk, noodles, and birth control? Sounds like someone is about to have a much better night than I am.

I met him on a chair lift when I was 12 or 13 around 2000 or 2001, so pretty peak age to be a Tony Hawk fan. He was super nice, asking me about where I had been riding that day, and I finally told him that I thought he looks a lot like Tony Hawk. He said it was him, and we chatted some more. Once we were off the…

It’s clearly low tie: you wear a tie just over your collarbone, not just under your jaw.

 Julian Fennessy, co-chair of the IUCN’s giraffe and okapi specialist group. “It is timely that we stick our neck out for the giraffe before it is too late,” he said.

A very hungry and resourceful African lion?

Kidding or not, the decision to stop making myself crazy trying to conform to beauty standard I could never hope to meet was one of the best I’ve made. I’m happier, I’m more confident, I’m more comfortable in my own skin. You couldn’t pay me enough to go back.

Best thing about Arnold stories is unfailingly hearing his voice in your head as you read his quotes.

As a former theater kid, can confirm.

I don’t even necessarily mean it in a derogatory way. That’s just what a theater kid would do: no one is paying attention! SONG TIME!!

I really want this story to be true.

Okay, so this is kind of the opposite, and it happened to a friend of mine. But:

A few years back, my friend is driving along North Avenue in Milwaukee, middle of the winter. She looks over at the sidewalk, and there is an extremely tall black man booking it down the sidewalk. Like, seriously sprinting. And he has…

I started one that claimed ISIS-conrolled slave labor was responsible for 78% of harvested pumpkin spice. Therefore, your pumpkin spice whatever is supporting ISIS. I got a few to buy in, but nothing grand.

I want to know more about this: “Welch says he only just installed internet service.” I didn’t expect to read that sentence in 2016

small businesses around america say they need help to survive in an increasingly hostile business environment, but let me ask my small business owner friends this: why haven’t you injected your employees with steroids and forced them to battle each other on top of ladders while wearing thongs?