I feel like I have to chime in here that most Americans don't give a fuck about soccer. Hell, most American sports fans don't give a fuck about soccer. Which is fine I guess, throw a bone to the soccer fans. I don't mind it if it's not at the expense of the shit the majority of American sports fans do give a fuck…

The expression of complete befuddlement that had to have been on R-Fed's face after getting that response must have been priceless. "Huh, already got a response. What? Oh." Welcome to Twitter.

How did I not immediately notice that?

Woosh!

Well, that and prison rape. HAWR HAR HAR DON'T DROP THE SOAP HAWR HAR HAR.

I live in Downtown Detroit and honestly, Detroiters are the most insecure people on the fucking planet. Any time the Tigers sign someone big the local media goes nuts with questions like "Don't you just fucking love playing in Detroit, aren't the fans just the fucking best fans, Detroit is the bestest EVAR" I've lived…

More importantly, all the shit they have to do after a game has to happen in the locker room because they have other shit they need to put on the air. The post game interviews have to happen in a timely fashion, no one's waiting around watching an hour after the game just so they can finally hear that great Jimmy…

Why the weird all-caps on WE?