Come on, be fair. If he didn’t call the timeout and get the technical, he would’ve given his team even less chance of winning. The only way the Warriors could extend the game was by getting the technical.

FOUND THE BRUINS FAN!!

How about this instead . . .

Definitely fuck the guy.

Smartass stuff aside, this is an excellent explanation.

I was hoping to actually see Brad Marchand have the life choked out of him, but will settle for the Bruins as a whole.

I think it's unfair to say that this is the reason they lost. It's probably only 80%, because fuck that guy. 

I know a lot of people are going to take satisfaction and glee from this because of Marchand’s previous actions. But keep in mind.... just kidding, fuck that guy.

Guy named “Chris Blewitt” is gonna be your kicker?  I don’t think so.  Who’s the QB ... Steve Piksix?  

Maybe they should practice more than one kick a day.

This is a killer comment.

Right-eared — and I also switch my hands back and forth if a call is dragging on, but! I will reach over with my left arm to keep that phone against my right ear because I’m fucking crazy man.

You mean a turn to Port...

Jeez, a little spoiler alert for those of us not in Little Rock? Thanks a lot assholes.

Sorry, but the correct response was “What is, Annapolis?”

I’m not sure about the relative quality of the Nepalese judicial system, but I’m guessing even there you can’t sue a mountain.

Dude's a doctor.  Not a necromancer.

What treatment do you recommend the doctor administer to the dead woman?

Revenge is a dish best served Gould.