I look at Lenny and think, “She must regret that every day.” Then I remember who she spends her days with.....

My goodness, had no idea these movements were so sacred I’d get snark just for disliking them... At any rate, I’d prefer the “dancing” be done away in the tumbling period, since male gymnasts don’t have to do this kind of stupid pandering. But I guess we need to emphasize that female athletes are still appropriately…

I’m a fairly straight guy, but whenever I see Zac Efron, I always have to mumble, “this guy, this guy keeps on getting better looking. I should probably stop drinking so many beers.”

LET ME AT EM.

I teach 4th grade, and one of my kiddos asked if he could do sharing on Friday. He brought in his iPad and started to talk about his favorite singer who had recently died. He played “Let’s Dance” for the class and shared pictures that he found on the internet. It was the sweetest thing ever! Most of the class had no…

$250,000 to Kinsman and $700,000 to her attorneys

I have been a big Bowie fan for some time, but this one hit me hard. I was shaking so hard I had to sit down. It took me a while to realize why: not only was Alan Rickman one of my first celebrity crushes, but he’s also the earliest crush who still remains (it’s been about 13 years). All of those before him had been…

Okay, first: Kudos to the teacher who didn’t attribute the child’s exhaustion to laziness or disrespect. I know that should be a given, but many signs of abuse and neglect are blamed on the child.

That's one badass assistant principal.

Well, my team in the lab says it’s pretty good but their analysis should be taken with a grain of salt as they’ve been known to falsify some data. Also, they’re imaginary.

Sweets and chocolate are outlawed, along with dairy products, salt and preservatives

It’s really more paranoid than clever, but thanks.

There’s a joke to be made about people at Sea World getting tortured in a small glass enclosure, an environment they are not suited to be in, and needing to be released back into the wild, but it’s Monday and I’m tired.

I believed that it was illegal to drive with your dome light on because my dad told me and my siblings that on every long road trip where we desperately wanted to read in the car. I only recently found out that this is just merely annoying for the driver. I'm 26.

I’m a guy, and this horrifies me more than I can express.

oh my god i didn’t know i needed that to happen until just now