1.) I don't like to shave my legs. It's one more time-wasting thing I'm societally-obligated to do.

You can take those words out of quotes, douchecock.

He looks like Fred Armisen dressed up as Guy Fieri.

Hey, this is between you and your vagina.

He looks like Screech and Eminem's lovechild.

He is not related to The Blerghs in any offical capacity.

My "So Type A, introverted, and down-to-the-point that I could be a character on The Big Bang Theory" self loves this approach.

Go in Jack Wills right down the street. It markets to the classier college boys and girls, but the staircase in there is gorgeous.

1. He thought that people were secretly communicating with him. It's safe to say he's not neurotypical.

You're an Evo. Psych?! *cat hiss*

No.

And when they can't get birth control because it's too expensive/not covered...? You see where I'm going with this, I presume.

For women living in areas where abortion is pretty much illegal... condomless sex is dangerous.

Well, there are people today who worship the Egyptian pantheon. They're called Kemetic Reconstructionists, so you might want to take that up with them.

THANK YOU.

Not enough said.

This is what happens when you have a child who is born with the genetics which cause their cognition to deviate and thus, become sociopaths.

It's a textbook case of affluenza.

I don't have time for your ridiculous, bigoted ass.

Go fuck yourself, doucheknuckle.