Good news for Cavs fans: you'll dominate in the paint this season.

hard Cap

Denial can be the only way to make it to next September

This Morning's Winner: Miss Cleo

Given the way the game played out, shouldn't the dick be facing the other way?

@Wazinga: +1

Stiff upper lip, Man City.

We should all just be thankful we're not talking about "the bloody crotch game" this morning.

@thewhizzonator: Thanks?

@Bernie Carbomb: That's great.

@Phintastic: Undoubtedly. The power of the redacted comment is clear to me now, but I'll take my lumps. Pursuing another star is at least as good a use of my time an anything tangentially work related.

The monkey, meanwhile, spent all of his earnings on hookers and blow.

Fortunately for ESPN their insurance covers this specific incident, since Lee Corso throws a toilet lid through a hotel window at least twice a month.

@Drew Magary: Wow. I admit it was low hanging fruit, but I checked pretty carefully to make sure nobody else had made the obvious joke. Guess it's back to the drawing board.

@Hatey McLife: The wise consumer buys them in bulk at Costco.

"What other time do you get to put something in someone else's body?"

As you can see, The Gladiator is a soft-hard-soft design

@Arthur_Digby_Sellers: That's awesome.

@Clinton Portishead: Welcome back.

I like that the guys are wearing gloves while beating the naked man taped to the ladder. Safety first.