“Cher tells unjustly fired school guard: I got you, babe” would also score the points.

““Yeah, they don’t let Barry into Pet Planet anymore because he would spend way too much time inappropriately stroking the snakes... the last straw was him laying on the floor with one whispering ‘Thissssssssss feelssssss right’”

It’s become abundantly clear that American Catholics care primarily about allegiance to the RCC, not the Constitution, or their fellow citizens, or even basic morality. It’s a church of obedience, not morals - much like other top-down authority churches, like the LDS, Scientology.

Wow. This motherfucker really is this dumb? 

They came for the dog fighting, and I didn’t speak up.

cunts are have depth and use, and are warm. She possesses none of those qualities.

No one feels sorry for that stone cold cunt

It doesn’t even look like they included the best machine - it pays every time:

Posted in all caps too, so he must be taken seriously! /s

“I mean, I’d never really considered it. What if I really am just a belly-itcher?”

Kelly has yet to comment publicly on the matter, but if she did, I would imagine it would be something along the lines of: “I’m not racist! I have black guns! Some of my best guns are black!”

And people actually thought he’d beat Floyd Mayweather in a boxing match.

You take over your enemies...by doing their PR? 

Michael Bolton knows his pain.

Also I would like to own a hat

This is the old man I strive to become.  Has empathy, but not without enjoying the absurdity of life. Also I would like to own a hat

You could just have written about the confrontation but at the end you took things further and peppered in some practical advice on how to modify the vehicle to prevent this. The extra effort you put in is noticed and appreciated.

Im really surprised at the amount of actual punk bands that appear on this list who would fight you tooth and nail for being represented as such.

If we HAVE to stand for a specific song, and HAVE to put our hands on our hearts or risk getting jacked are we really free?

So what’s the deal, people put those up their butts? Do they have any for beginners? Those seem a little heroic.