All truly excellent questions !!!

Are you sure that you are not married to me already ? You've pretty much got it covered. All those questions have to be applied to both parties. Some caveats, though.

I have an old GPS I will ship to ya real cheap. The last car we bought has built-in GPS. our smartphones serve as a backup when the built-in turns out to be inaccurate - and it's maps are getting pretty stale. Dealer wants an arm and TWO legs to do a map update.

Or just reading Excel's built in help . I used to amaze our help desk callers by walking them through convoluted procedures over the phone. My secret ? I knew that Word or Excel would likely do what they wanted and I could guess what Microsoft called that function within three guesses searching the built-in Help.…

This is so OMG territory - You are so correct. I sometimes use Excel as a data source for Crystal Reports. Why ? I often get stuck with the headache of figuring out who is in this database, but not THAT database. The two databases are ALWAYS on two very dissimilar platforms, but darn near everything nowadays…

Yup. Stock photo is nearly as old as I am. Throw me into some WordPerfect for DOS and Lotus 123 and I will show these young whippersnappers how it's done......................................................................Now get off my lawn.

The ones that comment about my unhealthy eating habits? I usually just club them repeatedly over the head with my full bottle of Mountain Dew. Even if the comments don't stop, it's highly therapeutic for me.

"...but by respecting the other person and helping rather than shaming them, you have a better chance of convincing them to be a healthier person."

p.s. The Styx song "Too Much Time On My Hands" is also running through my head now.

Here is a different perspective:

Aaaaand....this is one more reason for me not to run, ever.

"First hand experience with glycerin suppositories". Hehhehhehhehheh.

Tee hee! "Little stools" .

Temporary workaround whilst troubleshooting wired network problems:

Human blood of ANY kind is a magical substance in it's ability for small amounts to cover everything in sight. A single teaspoon will paint the exterior of Donald Trump's house.

No. It's Yewts ! LOL

Sometimes Dr. Phil drives down the road to looneytown, but he is dead on with this one. I find that he is pretty darn good with relationships analysis, but when he gets into medical stuff he is out of his knowledge base.

You guarantee ? My gosh. Do they not teach the Great Depression in History class any more ? Forget that little mortgage industry fiasco ?

"It slices ! It dices ! It even makes Julienned fries ! It's the exciting new Catz-O-Madic !!!" ......Well, a lynx IS a type of cat, so I can sort of see the naming, but it doesn't look at all like a cat..............I guess the name "SuperDeluxeMultiPlatformSwissArmyHandCramperMaster" was already copyrighted by…

Ditto. Be polite, courteous, honest, remorseful and allow the nice officer to be in charge. Promise never to do it again. I live in Florida - officers REALLY do not want to stand around or sit idling in the car in the full sun most of the year here. A couple things to ALWAYS keep in mind is that cops mostly have…