This needs so many more stars. 

These are the scariest- when you can see it actually happening.

Don’t worry about the typos-- that was terrifying.

Edit: The title would be “I kind of hope it was rats all along.”

I love this so much and it reminds me of the only time I made a customer cry:

Noel stands quietly in the corner, struggling to hide a smile.

This. The air is humid, the temperature is rising to the 90s (again), and every colorful fake fall leaf decorating the Halloween candy aisle is a cruel taunt that will cause me to break sooner rather than later.

Counterpoint-stick them in a performing arts academy and watch them flail as they realize that all the tennis ball money in the world can’t make them a better actor. Not that I’m recalling a particularly triumphant audition process or anything.

Not paying more attention to Nirvana when I saw them in 91. My friend’s boyfriend at the time was (is?) good friends with Dave Grohl and was able to get us on the guest list at an east coast club. I had heard their cd, but honestly my ears were so full of bands practicing in my neighborhood, my work, my back yard…

If I had some sort of artistic talent/power I would definitely use it to smite my enemies.

This was a 30 Rock episode--it didn’t go too well for Liz and Jack either.

I live near GMU and the sight of those bots speeding down the campus street is unsettling. Dogs go wild.

Any idea how much the shoppers/delivery make an hour? Are they Wal Mart employees or are they sub contractors? Is it dependent on tips? Who pays for gas?

“She” has brought up the emails many times? I’m really hoping that this is satire.

The day I learned to stop boiling/roasting/sauteeing vegetables and just let my kids have at whatever raw is thrown in a bowl was a happy time indeed. Seriously-at one time each would have happily eaten their weight in goldfish crackers, but they also wouldn’t say no to a bag of broccoli or snow peas or carrots if…

The common areas in assisted living communities are extremely popular with these sorts of shows. And why not? Their all young (ish) women with big smiles who seem to talk right to you which is more than what most of our society does.

Community theater is the best! The drama is inevitable, but is also kind of fun as long as no one gets hurt. 

One of my daughters started taking all her siblings’ band shirts (MCR etc) and wearing them with black shorts, black scrunchie and knock off combat boots. She says she’s ‘alt VSCO’ but she may just be messing with me.

I can’t find a quote, but I remember William H Macy pontificating as to how bad television was for children under five while he was promoting his voiceover role on Curious George. The upshot was that, while he and his lovely wife had enough money to give their own little babies better options/challenges/prizes galore,…

In a sense, you are the customer who threw a lit cigarette at me because I had the nerve to put an ashtray on your table and ask you if you wouldn’t mind using it instead of the patio floor. I’m pretty certain she did not forget you.