These irritated articles make it sound like the force driving speculation about Middleton was the belief that she was getting divorced or whatever. But most of the people believing “conspiracy theories” thought that there was something bad about Middleton’s health they weren’t being told.

They weren’t conspiracy theories.

Right. If the British Royal Family is just a normal family, whose health is largely none of our business, then great, but then they shouldn’t have any role in the government or receive and government funding to continue to exist.

It’s interesting to me that Catholic horror is such a thing, in a way no other religion really matches. Some big part of it is the pageantry — clothing, rituals, and architecture that remains instantly recognizable and stubbornly resistant to modernizing. Catholicism maintains a surprising air of ancient mystery for a…

Atticus Finch?  More like Atticus SHIT, am I right?!?!

Since the article mentions 80s nostalgia, it feels like Generation X was immediately mythologizing that era, in a way similar to the way baby boomers were aggressively nostalgic about the 60s immediately after it was over.  I don’t think that’s true for every generation.  

If you told dead Richard Nixon about a drag queen television star allegedly sexually assaulting other aspiring drag queens, I think the 5 o’clock shadow would not be chief among his concerns.

The AV Club does an awful lot of stories about celebrity sex assault allegations. There’s one concerning the allegations related to Nickelodeon now.

That’s always been my problem.

Mickle Mantle’s corpse is doing a disappointingly poor job batting for my baseball team.

Right. It would be like saying we should make a movie about Will Ferrell’s executive character from Barbie, because people loved Barbie and the character was in Barbie.

I try to keep the spirit of both with me, all through the year.

I don’t blame actors for taking a paycheck on a bad movie.

The trailer looked like some nasty fun.  I fully support Bill Skarsgård’s apparent decision to make absolutely bonkers action movies his thing.

I feel like the Crow director whose lead actor didn’t get killed on set probably has the upper hand in this argument.

One of the reasons the modern AV Club increasingly reads like AI is the misuse of sentence structures like this:

I also go by “J Ryko.”

Yes, but one of the primary reactions to the movie from queer audiences also seems to be horniness:

I’m sorry, I thought this was America.

It’s extraordinarily arrogant to impose on hundreds of people and effectively tell them that what you have to say is more important than what they have chosen to do with their time.