Huh. I like incredible pastries and cakes and such, but I don’t always eat them. Some people have, what’s it called, self-control.

Apparently you like being patronizing as well.

“Honor code” my ass! I would give the cheater one opportunity to come clean, before I spilled the beans to person who was cheated on. Unless I suspected that violence would result, then I would go directly to the person who was cheated on.

And the “she’ll figure it out when she’s ready” bullshit. Like there’s some supernatural force psychically providing this information whenever someone hits some spiritual maturity point. It’s bullshit.

“I totally understand cheating”

Agree. Most of us actually go into relationships and marriages trusting and loving the person we’ve chosen to spend our lives with and are not on the look-out for ‘signs’. For me, discovering my ex had been cheating for years came as an absolute shock. It made no sense as we were happy and had a great life. He just…

Do not blame yourself. Look at it this way: I found out my husband, whom I had been with for 20 years, had been cheating for most of our relationship, including with friends of mine. I still have to deal with the fucktard due to kids. Be thankful that you can walk away clean. Nothing you did could ‘make’ someone…

I had a slightly similar situation, and the number of people who crawled out the woodwork to tell me he'd cheated after our breakup - they'd known for YEARS he was appalling and said nothing.

You understand cheating?

Not just made a fool of. Their whole reality is false. You think you have a marriage and what you have is a travesty, and there goes your life. I think about Maria Shriver, and Ahnold fucking whatever stood still long enough.

Bullshit. Chickenshit. Whatever someone’s going thru they can work with the truth.

That last line: “women are often ‘crazy’ until it turns out they’re ‘stupid’ is everything.

I was wondering how she bought that, but you just made me sit back down and shut up. That last sentence couldn’t be more true.

Well that’s my story too...minus the witness protection. Ok, also minus the marriage. Discovered fiancé was in a full blown other relationship through Instagram. Idiot must have thought he was safe as I didn’t have the app or an acct; he didn’t realize that anyone can see insta posts on the web-based version. Effed up…

Gaslighting is a hell of a thing, ain't it?

Sing it! It’s “How could you think that? I would never cheat on you! I can’t believe you think I’m that kind of person.” And if you have nothing but a gut feeling ... yeah ... especially with a baby on the way. I can see how she tried to believe him until she found direct evidence. Hell, he’s probably telling them…

I, too, had the misfortune to be involved with someone leading a double life. ANY PERSON saying this woman ‘should have known’ something was afoul in Denmark deserves to be spat on. A grifter will do whatever it takes, for as long as it takes to get what they need from you. It's nice to insult her intelligence when…

This. Thank Tou. There’s nothing like blaming her for him being a good con man.

“Women are often ‘crazy’ until it turns out they’re ‘stupid.’”

1. Seems it did raise red flags which was why she was investigating his facebook page. It’s not impossible she suspected something before but didn’t have the evidence she needed. She may have even talked her self (perhaps with his assistance) into thinking she was being paranoid or overly jealous.