This is the correct answer but likely not for the reasons you intended.

Bitch.... Michelle O accomplished more in her life BEFORE she became first lady than you and your whole tornado bait trailer trash family have ever even read about. Double Ivy League Graduate. Lawyer. Hospital Administrator. Mother. Go getter. Accomplisher of many things, not the least of which is to be married to a…

Air BNB.

This is going to get to him bigly.  She could have written that his presidency is the worst thing to happen to America since 9/11.  She could have written that his wife is hideous looking and braindead.  She could have written that he is a grade-A asshole and dumber than a nutless squirrel.  She could have called his…

This is really going to complicate his supreme court confirmation hearing in 2052.

I’m a fan of your “work” on this site, but a steak without onions is not a steak. Signed a Chef/Philly native that 5 years ago moved to a way better place to live. 

.... as long as you give him more than 2 minutes to answer

“Scorched earth doesn’t actually work as well as you might think.”
-Phillies grounds crew

Would you look at that, a Motorsport where you battle for the lead and change positions often!

McLaren is apparently too cool for F1 podiums too.

Many have already said this, but it is definitely a Shooting Brake and not a Station Wagon or Estate. 

Take your star, get AIDS and die

Those Phillies throwbacks are fucking awesome.

FLIP, FLIP, FLIPADELPHIA!

I didn’t really care if they were comfortable or not

Majors are always better when Tiger is contending. 

Buy a Singer...

You have been banned from /r/Jalopnik

But for $300k you can safely get yourself into appreciating asset territory...

One of the best parts about working at Jalopnik is being surrounded by incredible, talented writers who are completely wrong about most things. Since I wasn’t able to be the voice of reason in the body of the post, I’m commenting.