Sounds like they're way out of their ranges too. An octave higher might not be so painful

What do you do on a turtle ranch? Do you have a guinea pig herd them around?

Okay, I admit that buying a house is the ultimate investment, but in my (albeit limited) experience if you get married in your 20s you are still planning to save for a house but in no position to put a down payment on one. (what puzzles me more is how many of my peers change their names, which is such a hassle)

This is exactly what I take issue with. It's 2012. Rings do not mean you are someone's "property" any more than getting a tattoo does.

Seriously, what is wrong with having a diamond engagement ring? Sure, I thought I was too cool for a diamond ring for a while, but when you get engaged it's normal to get excited! And it's fun to pick out your ring together, decide on a design you really like, and make a Grown Up Investment (of course you get it…

I watched it out of curiosity and really liked it! The main character reminds me of so many people I know who moved to NY after college (usually with their parents' help) and tried to get creative jobs. She has some of the terrible qualities I see in myself (and try to quash), but she makes them hilarious.

Yes! She looks like she'd slap your ass if she passed you on the sidewalk.

But only if they wrap them right so the gyro doesn't fall apart when you bite into it. I'm picturing inevitable dropping of food and involuntary clenching of kegel muscles around the speculum when leaning over to pick it up...

Yeah, I gave it to the Veterans association that always picks stuff up in our neighborhood. But not before my parents got their jokes in....

I just wish they would stop mailing free samples to my house. Just because I got married last year doesn't mean I'm ready to start pushing out babies, Enfamil!

While I'm not salivating, I totally agree - unless your vagina has actual cobwebs in it, there's no reason to be paranoid someone is gonna turn down sex.

I'm TOTALLY sure that works.

Did not get that impression...at all...

Yeah! Floyd, the Who, and Led Zeppelin! Then I would go to school and get beat up by the girls who listened to Destiny's Child. Oh middle school...

Whoops, tried to re-write my rant and messed up.

These posts are gonna be part of my new Jezebel drinking game. On every thread, find the one commenter who says "But what if we replace all the mentions of WOMEN in this article with MEN! Whooooa, think about it!"

I love your name.

PEOPLE! You don't need to stop taking your birth control! If it's the only one you Legitimately Can Take Without Terrible Side Effects, GO TELL YOUR DAMN DOCTOR. I used to work at an office for years and all we do is write a letter to your insurance company telling them you've tried X, Y, and Z covered alternatives…

Conditioner works so much better than shaving cream! And smells better, too - I love smelling like clean hair way better than the fucking Malibu Barbie perfume in those shaving creams.

"Personal responsibility" is one factor out of many. You're ignoring countless social, legal, historical, economic, and medical factors. Do you think everyone lives in a wonderful land where they can afford health insurance with no deductible?