Schumer and Pelosi weren’t really THAT bad. I agree with the earlier consensus that they weren’t the best choice for messengers, but they really didn’t say anything stupid. And Schumer isn’t wrong that Dems have had a hand in beefing up border security. I have feelings about that but I don’t think it was so much a…

Breaking News: Giants sign Eli Manning to 1 year contract extension

I never understand why teams decide to cheap out on their kickers at every opportunity. They score the most points for your team every season and have the most opportunities, why would you not want the best player you could possibly get to handle that?

Sports aren’t fun. I don’t know why I waste so much time on this shit.

With all of the unpleasant tanking going on, it’s refreshing to see a franchise really lean into “really fucking mediocre” like the Timberwolves do.

3 fumbles in a short span can't be a coincidence right? was it the ball, the qb, or something the defense was doing to upset the timing of the plays? seems like the qb

Brown missed out on a fucking game for reasons that might not even be his fault!

+1 sour dough

It’s like those discount baskets of bread you find at the supermarket. Sure, you’re getting a deal, but then the baguette calls you a pussy and you realize why it was so easy to acquire.

You can *physically* be out of bounds and still be OK as long as you last touched the floor in bounds. Durant did not do that. Not at all.

(Assuming you’re asking sincerely and I’m not so tired I’m just missing the joke): Kawhi is widely assumed to have faked/exaggerated his leg injuries last year, sat out most of the season, forced his way out of San Antonio via trade, and has suddenly reclaimed his basketball powers in Toronto. Danny Green was a member…

They were afraid that if they cheered for him, he might laugh. 

I’m not taking Brooner’s side, but I fail to see how a twenty-odd year old sexual assault conviction is relevant to this matter...

That is highly unsafe and deserves to be snitched on, gorillas are sentient beings, not rooftop sax slaves

Just to cover my bases, if you see the Booger Mobile for sale on Craigslist, please let us know at tips@deadspin.com

Easy answer, suspend him over the field of play ala the spidercam. I’m not saying we’d have to call it “The Hanging Booger” but it’s an idea.

Saying hanging out and partying with Machine Gun Kelly is a positive support system for someone with mental health problems might not age well.

“When I asked about the fault in our stars, Jim, I meant the book.”

You are right. Its wrong. You are a fucking degenerate. You are the problem with the world today. Good god, what an asshole.