They’re not making your dinner glow in the dark.. They’re just using better methods to get the same result as before.

Whatever marketing/PR person came up with the idea to sell that shirt needs a raise.

Borg confirmed.

Okay but why does one of my cats insist on being petted at exactly 730 in the morning and the other must be petted at exactly 1115 at night?

Previous articles mentioned that it was massaging as in touching her shoulders.

This is clearly a lie. Everyone knows Planet Nine has a gooey caramel center.

Yep, I found one with a dissertation on it once. I opened it up to find the guy’s name and shot him a quick email to come get his life’s work from the front desk.

I once found a USB that someone left plugged into a university library computer. It turned out to have their dissertation on it. I gave it to the front desk to get back to them but I wonder how screwed they would have been if someone less honest found it.

I am Dolly Parton and I AM a pirate. I plunder laundry hampers and leave trails of fur covered clothes as a map all over my territory. My food bowl is my treasure chest and I store all my pilfered make up brushes and hair ties there until they mysteriously disappear in an evil plot by my serving wench.

lbr Snacktaku would write some great car articles.

That second one refers to body hair only and it happens pretty fast.

There was a story recently about a person who changed his name to Bacon Double Cheeseburger. Seems to be working for him. “Hannah Cheeseburger” sounds nice and your kids will be popular in school.

I’m from the Ozarks and same. Looks crowded but I don’t see any outhouses so fair trade. Sometimes I forget that a lot of people would consider my childhood dirt poor instead of working class.

This is exactly how I eat Reese’s, down to the same order. I am concerned.

I was just at the Orlando park in January. Take her on the train and the Gringotts ride. There’s also a kiddy coaster and a couple little theatrical shows on the sidewalk. She’d probably love the sorting hat show right next to the castle. To avoid a meltdown, don’t stand under the dragon statue in Diagon Alley. It…