Ghosts are so much cooler. A good haunting is fun for everyone. Zombies are dumb.

Naw fool. Ima ghost. Zombies are so passé.

I’ve heard that too. But I don’t see an original one coming out next year.

My boyfriend started watching the opening of Up. I had to stop that because I did not want to sob before bed. Then during the entirety of Inside Out I was a wreak.

Whaaaaa? It got rave reviews, killed at the box office, I cried 4-5 times. What was wrong with it and what was it missing that other Pixar films had?

What if the asteroid that forever changed life on Earth missed the planet completely and giant dinosaurs never became extinct?

Realistically anyone who cares enough about the Bachelorette to attend a taping of this would already know about the tweets.

I’m confused at why people think that by posting it, I was implying we should all have sympathy for them. It’s a weird, crazy, nonsensical story that I found interesting to read; that’s the entire judgment I would attach to it.

Ricky Gervais had the best response to this non story:

I want him to die but first I want him to suffer in prison. Complete solitude. He doesn’t deserve any more comforts of life. He doesn’t deserve fresh air, sunshine, soul food, social interaction.

Too charitable. Mummified foreskin and cotton candy aren’t cartoonishly racist.

It means stabbing the barista and robbing the till.

She got the severe OCD and moderate anxiety. I got the panic disorder and moderate OCD. (The two go hand in hand.) You’re allowed to mock both of us! We do it to each other all of the time. It’s healthy for both of us to be reminded that our shit is irrational. “KARINZA STOP CRYING YOU DONT HAVE TO LOOK AT THAT…

I love raw dough and am not grossed out by raw eggs but, in theory I am horrified by the idea of eating raw flour. This is why if you want to eat raw cookie dough it should always be made from almond flour because raw almonds are fit for human consumption, but raw wheat is only food for cows!

“EAT YOUR SHAME CREATIONS IN SOLITUDE LIKE THE REST OF US, FREAK!”*

Yeah that point wasn’t lost on me either! We got a whole lot of shit to still work on and our history isn’t awesome but we’re also talking about a lot accomplished in a much shorter time period and we are still moving forward. Sometimes with a few backwards steps but still better than the places that don't even allow…

We are better off than a lot of people in a lot of countries. I don’t want to get all Lee Greenwood on y’all, but the fact someone can type “garbage country” on an unrestricted internet which people can read on free WiFi in a public library kinda disproves the point.

“Woo woo, America! You are still a garbage country but we appreciate you allowing us do some of the things we want to do.”

I mean on the bright side at least they told her no because boys are apparently quite stupid and need their own special hand-holding club.