You’re assuming I gave this more than 5 seconds of thought!

What? No. Stark’s story is over. Like, maybe in a flashback or as a spirit in a cameo or something, but actually bringing him back to life would undo the entire point of his narrative story arc and undermine the climax of Endgame.

But what if he shows up without a goatee this time?

Can’t. Already has the mirror universe look. They’d have to re-blip shit. :D 

Bring him back...but as a villain. Duh duh duh duhhhh.

I remember visiting my local Fry’s just before the pandemic, and it was barely occupied even though this was the same week as Christmas. My mother and I had gone there hoping to find some last minute deals, and walked away disappointed. It didn’t surprise me that they went out of business shortly after.

But what sticks…

AVClub: I’ll get to it eventually, gawd, get off my back!

AVClub.com: All The News That’s Fit To Eventually Print

From the Yahoo article:

You’re thinking Premier League level money. Wrexham are a fifth-tier team so scraping the barrel in terms of professional teams.

This was...many months ago, right?

The rumor has been for a long time that Seagal’s entire career was based on a dare from Mike Ovitz that he could make literally anyone into a star, so he picked his ridiculous personal trainer. I don’t know if that’s actually true but it sounds true. 

Is he being attacked by bees?

The sex crane...

Yep. I go and read that every so often when I need a lift. Think I’ll go do that right now!

Ignatiy’s review of Seagal’s Contract To Kill remains to this day one of the greatest things this site’s ever published.

Hah! You laugh because you don’t know it’s a SECRET TECHNIQUE developed by SPECIAL FORCES for MAXIMUM EFFICIENCY in COMBAT!!! Only EXCEPTIONALLY MANLY MEN know this ANCIENT KARATE WISDOM!!!

69 years old with jet-black hair.

He don’t dance too well either.

Correction: Steven Segal used to run weird. Now he needs a body double to walk up the stairs (like an incontinent toddler with noodles for arms)