I’m sorry, but this is a well-oiled machine:

OMG could he just fucking stroke out already?! Pence might nuke us all til we glow to speed up the return of his sky fairy, but I’m reaching the point where I’d welcome becoming a ghoul.

Edited to add

Wow.

I honest to God feel guilty for ever EVER saying Nancy shouldn’t be speaker. I was wrong. Please for forgive me. 

This is the big advantage of a 17 term veteran as Speaker - she knows where everyone buried the bodies!

The State of the Union is a Congressional address. The Speaker has to invite the President to speak! She can literally tell him to stay home and wash his toupee.

Van Jones will be terribly disappointed if he doesn’t get to jump up and down about how PRESIDENTIAL Trump sounds.

So nobody wants to see Trump struggle his way through his speech like a fifth-grader with a 3rd grade reading level giving a book report in front of the class?

Nah.  Beto will have some stoners on his staff.  Those fries will be found.

Soggy fries served in paper cups with the presidential seal is probably the most apt metaphor for this presidency. 

That is correct. Guy across the hall from me was evicted this summer, took them 3-4 months to get him out even after the notice was served (which I knew about because sheriff left it rubber banded to the door know with the first page visible.

1,000%. Without even looking at the filings I can guarantee that’s the case.

Following the Twitter thread, it appears she had been there for quite a while before she stopped paying.  IIRC, the lease was signed in 2015 and she didn’t stop paying until September 2016.

When my mom was out of town my dad would just make “salads” from the vegetable garden. I think he washed the produce though.

I 100% guarantee that the first place the Clemson group went after the White House was somewhere else to get real/better food. I have traveled with Power 5 football teams before. They like to eat and eat well. Judging from the pictures from the White House, that is not nearly enough food for the approximately 120…

I guarantee there are some french fries that got flipped into a corner that won’t be found until the second Beto Administration.*

Normally, it has to be planned well in advance to be shoehorned into the extremely busy schedule of the president.

Probably cause of the shutdown. And the fact that the President never has a busy schedule anyways

let’s hope he doesnt make a hatchet job of things.