You oppressor, it’s fucking SATURNALIA OR NOTHING AT ALL!

Modern Christians literally have no connection to actual Christ worship. We may as well call Christmas Saturnalia. My only hope is that there is a god and he comes to scoop them away in one sweep so I can get promoted and we can progress as a society.

Yeah I heard on NPR that Playboy is no longer doing nudes. My stepdads collection will be solid gold when I’m his age. And I already get the library in his will.

Seriously. Everytime I see a teacup anything I’m reminded how we are a cancer on the world.

I was there on the Saturday of the race. Scott Speed’s lead was untouchable. It was impressive. While Block was hitting walls and the rest of the racers were essentially playing bumper cars both VW’s were moving gracefully and the yellow one was even dragging its rear bumper for half a race. Don’t know what’s going on…

#creeperwink

Right? That’s a rough 31.

Huh, we say boucles.

A diet frosted lemonade? Diet? Why go aspertame when you can go full sugar for a last meal? I mean the after taste! You’re gonna have that taste in your mouth till the very end. It just doesn’t fade for hours.

You’re funny. I lived in that neighborhood. Its all Arab Money.

Yeah my fam tries to pull that bullshit on me at Christmas. Then I show pics of my summer vacation in Rome and St. Tropez. We all sleep in the beds we make.