@morninggloria: But but but I thought everyone was just as good as everyone else! And I still can't afford that yacht, and the streets aren't paved with gold, so things must be really bad, right?

Yes, if she hadn't went on about gay marriage and then appeared before countless congregations to be worshipped as the "New Queen Esther", we probably wouldn't be talking about this.

the "spirit" behind the U.S. Justice Department's efforts to bring Demjanjuk to justice is "the same satanic brew of hate and revenge that drove another innocent Man up Calvary that first Good Friday 2,000 years ago."

@pandorasmittens: IS rubbing.

Anyone who has worked in foodservice knows that the most effective way to reduce odors (especially that of cigarettes) are rubbing with lemons. Seriously.

I would buy that polka dot bikini in a heartbeat. I probably can now, but it is probably made by Juicy Couture, has a heart cut out of the ass, a belt whose bling would make a pro wrestler challenge you to a steel cage match for it, and probably costs $999,999,999.97.

Much less creepy than a felt womb. Put a chalice of Clamato in the background, and you are set for life.

Now I can't get "Anatevka" out of my head.

Rising up

@morninggloria: It just sucks because there are SO many contributing factors to why these companies are failing, a few of which they had absolutely no control over. And I want to believe that this is still essentially a free market where our tax money goes to support schools, roads, etc-not companies that royally…

@EkaterinaBallerina: I was thinking that as well. It very well could be Cat Cora, but if it is she looks completely different here.

The mystic tans are befuddling.

@NefariousNewt: Not to mention that Ford's losses are actually far less than expected. Ford is far from perfect, but it shows how fucked up the management at GM and Chrysler are. The people at the top of GM need to be shitcanned in a major way, and their severance and golden parachutes can be used to pay the benefits…

Congrats Besties! I feel so fortunate to comment on a site where I can choose between same hilarity and opposite hilarity.

Should kids be kids? For the most part, yes. But we have to consider the benefits to society, if at all. If Mozart had not been writing concertos and symphonies at such a young age, the world, history, and musical theory would have been denied an extraordinary figure. If it takes an articulate little girl to raise…

Can someone wake me when we're over our bad news quotient for the day?

@morninggloria: We can just abstain from Dominican restaurants during our staycations.

Seriously, fuck these people.

@bluebears: I actually think that would have been somewhat fun. Our Catholic school was of the "guilt" variety, where everything was an abomination against Our Lord. This included not drinking your milk, wearing shorts on a church day, and not selling Skittles in His Name.

@bluebears: We'd peddle anything and everything in our catholic school. Every year we'd have an art fair, in which kids had to actually MAKE crafts with their OWN supplies and sell them so the school could make money. We also sold candy bars, books, magazine subscriptions, and my parents were always solicited for…