+1 dicktooth

Chuck Brown will finally get that football.

We aren’t necessarily expecting to ‘catch’ Trump. He’s already been caught. We know what’s happening.

I hope you’re sweating grease, you pig of a POTUS

Alrighty then!

Finally. Now, who had Sep. 24, 2019 in the impeachment pool? 

Bwahaha! I got dismissed by Tomato (or a Tomato clone).

...I feel I’ve achieved something in life.

We are talking “lovingly grown by Grainger County, TN Lesbians heirloom tomatoes” here.

I thought Republicans didn’t have time on their hands to do this kind of shit because they were all busy working?

Tomato Face Hall of Fame.

This is some deep-cut Tomato work right here. 

Lewis cited being “deeply concerned about the future of our democracy”

Remember, folks: in the face of overwhelming evidence that Trump did treasonous and impeachable crimes, there is always somebody complaining that a Democrat or the family member of a Democrat is corrupt.

NBA Finals MVPs not in the HOF: Cedric Maxwell. Chauncey Billups is eligible this year. 

“Jay Sherman . . . is . . . a sex symbol.”

It’s a pretty simple, harmless mishap. The positive tests were marked with a +, which also looks like a cross, which could be construed as shorthand for “cross out”, which is the analog equivalent of digital deletion. Pure coincidence that it’s the same sort of innocent clerical error that happened from time to time…

I don’t think he remembers that the choice to give Obama the Nobel was more or less mocked by everyone at the time, and was seen as a weird choice. That being said, I don’t think Trump understands bullying Iran into a war they don’t want isn’t the action of a peaceful leader helping the world heal.

April O’Neil and Lauren Philips,

This is Not The AV Club: An XXX Parody