It's a 26 minute walk from my mom's house in Phoenix to the local multiplex… I've heard that Jews run Hollywood sooo… corroborating evidence?

The arms race for stronger and stronger strains is intolerable… like, I want to walk around, smoke a one paper spliff and feel relaxed. I don't want to be coughing and wobbly legged and horribly dizzy ant the end of it…

State's Rights are kind of an illusion… and a bit shit too. Any benefit from interstate competition is lost by how fractured the laws are.

I couldn't make heads or tails of that abbreviation. My brain saw it as 'dear heart'… then a part drifted off and started fondly recalling 'Red Dawn'.

I never have to hit 'Load More Comments'.

I forgot this came out.

"dh"??? That's a novel way to prove a point… yeah… they are both weird. Ugh… he probably felt cool lying about his porn habits because "this i'int porn loov! these birds fetched these snaps on their onsie" (or however the fuck you people talk)

If you're losing a social argument in such a way that you write in to an advice columnist… like, ok, so how is that supposed to help? You're in a shitty situation and your partner isn't yielding, it's been going on for months… so you write in and wait for weeks? It's entertaining for us but it's not a good way to…

Also in a midwest college town, the best part about living here is that my job sends me places that aren't here… well, beer is cheap too.

Oh yeah… it totally is in Sonoma… I thought it was in Mendocino.

You say that like it's a bad thing.

NC is so weird… I've always said "If you're going to have a coast, don't try to govern inland at the same time" (no, it's true, they're sick of hearing me say it at work when they ask about my weekend).

I bet Canberra is similar in that way… except worse, because Canberra has no history… It was built so Sydney and Melbourne would stop fucking each other over to be the Capital.

Healdsburg, CA is just up the road. Much nicer than Sonoma.

Denver is nice, but it's got sprawl… you know sprawl. We were born of it. A big city is fine, a small town is charming, sprawl is unforgivable. "Hey do you want to ride in a car for 50 minutes to go to a restaurant?" or "It's going to be 2.5 hours just driving to visit the doctor" or "I live in the neighborhood that…

It's like they looked at that whole U.N. thing and said, oh… ok, this works!

I play 'Asshole Bingo' over at The Atlantic…

It's really great for when you don't have weed.

I'd like both… and I want the Mexicans to pay for it.

???