I’ll never forget how bruised my knees were after my first time... *Sigh* ...ahem, skating!! Yes, my first time skating!!

Do you believe in miracles?! YES!!

Marc Norton really wants you to turn down the intensity Gideon...

This could save a lot of organizations from all of those unwanted dick-related headaches...

Whitey McWealthywhite...

There’s something about that italic ‘the’ that really isolates and ostracizes a population. Whether it’s a lacrosse coach saying ‘the public schools’ or 63 million Americans saying ‘the [insert racial group]’... It’s all bad.

Because when I refer to a joke about 1 person, I obviously mean all of the people.

Did he do his residency at University of Phoenix Medical Center?

Oh man, been there... I’ve been dealing with a pretty annoying headache and/or brain tumor all day.

How reasonable are we talking? These student loans aren’t going to pay themselves.

Source? Also, the user name is Larry McDonald and you’re a butthole.

(The user name is Larry McDonald.)

I’m a Browns fan and, thus, don’t have a dog in this fight — or any other fight for that matter — but I whole-heartedly support this idea. I know it would just end up with a big ol’ Tommy ToughNuts Twitter Tantrum®, but can you imagine the absolute cluster fuckery that would erupt at the mere thought of Donald Trump…

Go Tweet about it Donald. No one wants you here.

I totally agree. And, regardless of the nature in which he was being bullied, I really feel sorry that he doesn’t seem to get a whole lot of emotional support and is being raised in an environment which certainly seems to be on the wrong side of both history and compassion.

I just can’t understand why someone would be motivated to a) record a video of their emotionally distressed child instead of, you know, making an attempt to comfort them and b) post said video on the internet.

...being against ghetto thug (read: black) culture and having a confederate flag makes you a racist?

In what way is this article politicizing the story? There isn’t, at any point, the slightest reference to politics, political figures, or the government.  

Well, obviously the aliens aren’t at Area 51... It’s almost been a year, they’re definitely in a cozy detention center by now.