I have less information about what they did during this time than about what he did, so I don't know what kind of manipulation might have taken place. However, I have never assigned them any responsibility for what he did. He was 43 years old and fully capable of making his own decisions. Even if she literally offered…

Trying to work it out has been the most challenging thing I have ever done, and we are definitely not there yet. It's very difficult to rebuild trust after it has been shattered. I have heard that couples who do manage to reconcile usually take 2-5 years to fully reconcile (but many who make it through claim their…

You know, I look back on this, and I can see that the big picture is that I really did get my shit together after all this crazy stuff went down. But in a lot of ways I definitely do not feel like a bad ass - I still have a lot of down days, I still think about his affair every day and ruminate more than I would like…

Yeah, one of the things that really killed me about this was that I had been totally supportive of their marriage and their lifestyle - I never judged them about it, I was happy for them because they seemed to be happy. They had no respect for my marriage or lifestyle, however, and they didn't even have the fortitude…

Thank you.

Thank you. That's one of the nicer compliments I've ever received.

I really think a lot of the women who do this have serious emotional problems. What a horrible thing to do to a friend who trusts you.

Holy shit. This is the worst one in this thread. Live-in friend helping your partner cheat while you are going through chemotherapy and they tell you on your birthday. This has got to be the winner. Huge hugs to you. :-(

Ooooh, that's bad. Sorry. :-(

In the summer of 2013, I had spent 8 Very Long, Very Hard years in graduate school and was a mere two weeks away from defending my Ph.D. My monogamous husband of 8.5 years went over to visit our closest couple friends' of 5 years house to drink and play video games while I worked on all of my dissertation shit.…

You are welcome! I was so excited when I found it - it really is hard to find anything plus-sized that actually has a discernible shape.

Completely agree. I need MORE structure in my clothing than skinnier girls, not less! I seriously despise this trend of flow-y, drape-y clothing. I think it started because that kind of material is cheaper to make and they also don't have to do the work of fitting patterns - they can just throw a piece of some gross…

Well, that's disappointing. :-(

Not to mention that you never know what might happen in a marriage. People who are financially dependent on their spouses have many fewer options if their spouse decides to have an affair, for example. It's always good for both people to have their own source of income.

Yep. This one little anecdote says it all. Anyone who wants to know the reason behind this trend can just read this one sentence. Men want the fun parts of parenthood while mom still cleans and cooks and changes diapers, but a lot of women have gotten wise to the fact that the burdens of parenthood will fall squarely…

Ha, ha, exactly! I had a lot of open relationships in my twenties as well. Now at age 40 I'm doing well to just get the dishes done every day, much less manage group dating and endless talks about everyone's feelings and jealousy.

I agree. Throughout the whole first half of this (pre "Sex At Dawn"), I just kept thinking, "oh, girl, no". If her model of monogamy is some kind of Disney-fied uber-romance Someday-My-Prince-Will-Come nonsense, of COURSE she had trouble with her monogamous relationships. She could have done a lot of things to move…

Yeah, Saybrook is pretty much a joke.

LOL! Awesome! I love this.

I am very much looking forward to this year's tour - have floor seats for NOLA in May!

I am very much looking forward to this year's tour - have floor seats for NOLA in May!