"he hit me and it felt like a kiss"

But they give you prescription painkillers, which are similar. When I had mine out I apparently complained about a penguin being in my mouth when I woke up. Then I went home, demanded that everyone watch Legally Blonde, took two Oxycontin and then passed out during the opening credits.

Yes we do. It makes us feel connected to the commoners. (Also why we had surgery at Kaiser.)

Going to follow Yoko's advice and do the following:

Is she really that popular, because I've never heard of herbivore.

Eh, I'd say it really depends. It IS a small world, after all...

That's unfortunate. Support for Palestine is the first smart thing I've heard from Rihanna but, apparently, that's the line she's unwilling to cross.

I think it means having a LOT of etsy circles.

I like to think I'm a pretty intelligent guy. I went to a good university, am a professional type, do pretty well at shouting out the answers to jeopardy before my boyfriend(provided the category is potent potables or Famous Hockey Players named Gordie or what have you) but...what the fuck does it mean to live a…

What a sad way to rank your sexual options.

My dad did something very similar to Alicia Silverstone.

Uh, exactly what dudes are ALL ABOUT anal sex so long as they're not receiving?

circumcision is when a dick is filed down into a point, yes.

I think the lede here is buried, in that according to the OP on MTO, Drake is a CUNNILINGUS MASTER: "I must have c*me like 3 times while he was doing it. On after the other, after the other. I have had my box eaten hundreds of times, but no one has EVER done it like Drake. He has a real talent. His tongue went from…

Oh for crying out loud- can people please stop acting like straight men liking ass play is weird? It's 2014... about time for pop culture to become a little more open minded.

You could look like Kim Kardashian for less than that!

(Copy-pasting my response to another comment)

"The snide comments and casual racism here is just ridiculous."

dragon toilet seat was definitely cursed

No, I win. Nope. Nope nope. I win. Okay. Here goes. It's long but (I think) it's worth it.