This is a tangent at best, but I've just finished watching The Fall, and between that and Breaking Bad (and this story), I have to wonder why the hell people think their children's rooms are good places to hide shit. Because kids are definitely not curious, nosy little fuckers who get into everything..?

I actually did meet Bjork... it was Trannyshack... 5... maybe 7 years ago. It's was Bjork night... and suddenly in the drunken dinge of the Stud (a bar in San Francisco) a little fairy in a full body Pucchi jumpsuit that looked like a butterfly emerged from the cocoon of throbbing dancing bodies.

I guess we're talking about beauty privilege, which I fully acknowledge is a real thing, and through which I have had countless unearned advantages.

I mean, these are just 70s emoji, right? Like pop that boob in and put her in a pink top and I swear that girl is already in my iPhone.

If you haven't heard this song by baby Björk you are truly missing out on joy.

Thinking of you, my friend. Try to find someone who practices CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) or DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy).

Ah the first visit of the dildo fairy. Such a magical time.

Things I have learned:

it's more effective to do your exfoliating (salycic acid) and moisturizing separate. try st ives exfoliating pads or stridex in the red box (my fave) followed by cerave moisturizer (I like the kind in the tub, but I added a pump top so my dirty fingers don't contaminate the whole thing). they are way cheaper than $34…

it's more effective to do your exfoliating (salycic acid) and moisturizing separate. try st ives exfoliating pads or…

That is actually taking up a huge amount of my time right now. I was set up with potential financial planners right away and have already had countless info sessions and interviews. I never had to learn any of this and now am trying to catch up as much as possible. So yes, totally on it. Having money is one thing,…

I'm easily the worst in the class every time I show up, but I'm learning.

This is Mark Shrayber, right?

How to make a proposal all about you 101

My birthday is a few days before Christmas, and Barbie came out the year I was four. My father was sick that year and in and out of the hospital, and my mom was working nights in a restaurant to support us.

I do appreciate that! I will have to add this to my cooking song list

My dad quit smoking cigarettes thirty years before he died, but smoked weed up until the end. It actually helped a lot, so we told the hospice nurse it was medicinal. But, yeah, he started smoking regularly when he was 11. Four is insane. Those were different times. My dad had his first job when he was six.

That reminds me of this: