I hear you, but this response is still not okay at its heart because it is more about a hypothetical man’s need or desire to make this big, memorable gesture- that (as you can see from the responses in this thread) many women find unwelcome, feel pressured by, or feel embarrassed by- than any genuine wish to make…

Seconding Keens and Mephistos (Mephistos are truly amazing), also adding Born, and Earth Shoes.

This is just the food of frustration. All the ingredients are delicious but they’ve managed to arrange it in a way that makes it enraging to try and eat.

Usually, I’ll find my own errors about an hour after I’ve hit publish- if I’m lucky.

Chronic pain person, crafty as fuck, generally pretty freaked out by heaps of stuff, popping in to say I’d be touched as HELL to find this in my cabin. Gestures matter. Thank you for doing this for a total stranger.

Birkenstocks until it gets dead cold and I need a back on my shoes. Then the Danskos come out.

No. Just stop.

Oh for fuck’s sake John Green.

And mold!

Wooden toilet seats too. I’m sorry about your Country- Western- themed bathroom and all but I just don’t believe you’re getting all the butt germs out of wood. Also, I may have a thing about germs in the bathroom but I don’t think I’m alone here.

“Ou” dates back to the late 1700's. It may be obscure and maybe nobody around you uses it, but that doesn’t make it less real. Don’t be obtuse and hey, don’t be transphobic, maybe? New information doesn’t have to be scary or upsetting.

Jesus jackhammering Christ, that’s something I never ever wanted to know. Why would she share that?

That’s true. And it’s also offensive because that wording- “looking masculine”- implies that there is only one correct way to be feminine/ female/ a woman, and that’s to present as “femme”. I get that Schumer might not have intended harm- maybe that’s Feminism level 2, I don’t know- but that doesn’t mean she didn’t…

Yoga teacher here, co- signing: it can really be the worst. I’m disabled (MS) and the first time I heard the word “cripple” as an insult (or used at all, really) was from my yoga teacher trainer, and it didn’t come as any surprise, for example. Guru culture is also a problem, and damn, the racism/ classism/…

Lucky lady. I’m a white girl who married a white guy and I still walked into all those in- law expectations, which seems super- weird to me because my MIL hadn’t done a lot of that for her husband- although, in retrospect, she had done all of that for her sons, so-???. Misogyny is so bizarre. *shrug*

The Washington Post repeatedly used “forced himself upon” which, unless I was dramatically misreading every piece of Vic lit I came across, is their way of saying “rape” when the charges are “sex trafficking” and “sex tourism”. When a grown man is having any kind of intercourse with a 14- year old girl, but most…

Yeah, but for that specific reason those leggings are pretty badass though!

Yeah, my husband took me for surprise: he’s the opposite of what used to be my type. Younger than me by two years, white, blond, stocky, bearded (although that happened after we got together, I’m still surprised by how much I like that), male, ex- military, a video game nut—- everything about him is so not my typical…

And “people who work in activist communities which are concerned about police over-reach” seems like a decent answer to the “who needs three phones?” question, btw.

I can’t think of a world in which “hey, I’m your uncle and I want to touch your new tits” isn’t sexual assault, but hey, you do you.