Hells yes, I had this shit on VHS, too!

The production I saw in Seattle a few years ago had an Asian (Filipina?) actress as Cinderella, Jennifer Paz. She was excellent!

I'll just leave this right here:

3. Fanny farts.

As I rule, I avoid playing chicken with armed muggers. But that's just me.

Yeah, it's my understanding that the grass just becomes "dormant" and will come back around when the time's right. I do water my lawn every once in a while in the summer for that reason—to make sure the roots deep-down stay alive even if the lawn is mostly brown. Thank god it finally rained and I can go back to…

YES, SIGN ME UP. And she would have to have some cute catchphrase for the elimination. Maybe pulling the last petal of a flower and saying, "She loves you NOT. KTHNXBAI." Or probably something better than that.

It's from a blog called Seeds For Learning. Apparently the original poster was very gracious about the whole thing.

I would totally take her up on this offer! All my nieces are now officially too old to be flower girls and... oh wait, still don't have a dude to marry. Crap, she'll probably be too old by the time I find one of those!

I love the sentiment, but I wish she had written this from her heart and hadn't plagiarized it from a blog post. There's no shame in taking ideas from the internet, but take them and make them your own!

YES. I encountered one of these in my first apartment in Seattle. I caught it in a giant plastic cup, but I was too scared to go near said cup. Two days later, I had my bed delivered, and after providing a sizable tip, I asked the delivery guy to get rid of the spider far away from my house; it had built a funnel web…

Exactly what I came here to say. I got my Masters TWO YEARS ago and have yet to find work in my field. I volunteer to keep something relevant to my field on my resume, and I worked part-time at Macy's for a year to make ends meet. I was fortunate enough to have a paid internship last year, but I have basically been…

To his secret bunker to plan world domination, OBVI.

My favorite part of this is that you can creep on your cat while she eats lunch. I mean, I would love to creep on all my pets when I'm not home, but watching them eat sounds about as boring as you can get.

Yes! I'm thinking of it as a dog deterrent more than anything else.

I've always felt weird about the Kong Safestix. A tug toy? Suuuuure... for tugging with your butt!

Also, "cats" requires no apostrophe in your sentence. KTHNXBAI

I'm sorry for all the straight-up hate you're getting. I understand exactly where you're coming from: I have depression and anxiety, and I take my dog with me whenever/wherever I can. I'm dying to get my dog certified, but I don't know that I have the time or the money to do it. I also understand where everyone else…

I'm getting a tattoo done tomorrow. Maybe I should just bring this pic in and be like, "New plan...."

And plus no one would ever need watch the Hallmark Channel. Ever again.